


You Are All I Need

by keepthelightson



Category: Happiest Season (2020)
Genre: During Canon, F/F, Fluff, POV Multiple, Smut, relationship repair, they are super soft with one another because that's how I want them to be goddamn it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-08
Updated: 2021-02-10
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:55:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 23,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27947906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keepthelightson/pseuds/keepthelightson
Summary: A detailed look at Harper and Abby's life after their Christmas trip to the Caldwell's beginning with their car ride home and continuing through the year, eventually ending in the 'One Year Later' montage at the end of the movie.
Relationships: Harper Caldwell/Abby Holland
Comments: 141
Kudos: 339





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Saturday, December 26, 2020

“Text me when you get home safely. Please,” Tipper said as Harper threw her bag into the trunk of her salt-coated red Hyundai. The please was an afterthought and Harper knew this instruction was more of a command than a request.

“I will. And before you ask, yes, I did get my leftovers from the fridge. Abby is bringing them out, she’s just making sure she didn’t leave anything downstairs.”

Just as Harper finished speaking, Abby stumbled out of the front door with her duffel bag slung over one shoulder and a bag of leftover food in each hand. She approached the car carefully, knowing all eyes were on her. She hated that feeling after everything that had happened. The happiness of Christmas morning had faded into an awkward tension. It wasn’t a surprise, really. It was unreasonable to think all of the Caldwell’s problems would be solved in 24 hours. She almost couldn’t even believe everything that had happened in the last few days.

“I’m going to hit the road,” John said, eyes glancing across the driveway. “Tipper, Ted, thank you again for allowing me to stay.”

“It was no problem, John. Pleasure to meet you,” Ted responded.

“Abby, I’ll text you later. We still need to circle back to the fish,” John said as he got into the car and closed the driver’s side door.

John started the car and drove down the long driveway leaving Ted, Tipper, Harper, and Abby standing in the mid-morning cold. Sloane, Eric, and the kids had departed early in the morning thanks to the kids’ pre-dawn energy. Jane had said her goodbyes on Christmas night, looking forward to a quiet day at home with her writing today. The remaining Caldwells and Abby glanced quickly at one another without saying a word. Nobody seemed to know quite what to do. The day after Christmas always has an unusual feeling. After weeks of decorating and preparation it is always strange when the big day is suddenly over. This year at the Caldwell’s, though, it was so much more than that.

Abby found the confidence to break the silence, knowing she was only seconds away from finally getting out of there. “Thank you again for having me T-” Abby stopped before finishing her sentence. In that moment she wasn’t sure if she should call them by their first names.

“You are welcome. We’ll see you soon,” Tipper responded.

Ted approached his daughter and gave her a silent hug. Abby and Tipper looked at each other cautiously, and after a second of thought, Tipper approached her for a brief but awkward hug. Once Ted and Harper had broken their embrace, Tipper gave her daughter a hug while Abby shook Ted’s outstretched hand.

“Bye Mom, bye Dad,” Harper called out as she and Abby got into the car, ready to begin the long trek home.

As soon as the car left the driveway, there was a sigh of relief from both women knowing they were finally headed home. However, what six days ago might have been comfortable silence was now deafening.

“Abby, I don’t even know what to say. I –"

“Yeah, that was not the hap-hap-happiest family Christmas I had hoped for.”

“I should have been honest with you. I should have told you I wasn’t out to them yet. I should have told you more about them, more about my life before you.”

“Babe, when I told you that I could handle the truth, I meant that. Why didn’t you tell me?”

The car sped up as they merged onto the highway. No new snow had fallen the previous night, leaving the highway dry with a powdery white coat of salt atop the pavement. The sky was full of puffy, white winter clouds. It was almost as if it knew a bright, sunny day would be too much.

“I was so scared. I couldn’t tell them over the summer. I just couldn’t bring myself to say the words. My whole drive home, I dreaded telling you I didn't do it. I didn’t want you to be disappointed in me. You are so sure of who you are. I didn’t know if you could… if you could love me if I couldn’t do it. I knew I had to, and I failed.”

Harper was clearly emotional, but she was keeping it together, perhaps only because she was driving.

“And then, when you actually wanted to come home with me for Christmas, I thought I could make it work. I wanted to spend Christmas with you more than anything. I wanted to know how special Christmas would be with you by my side. I really thought I could make it work. I’m so sorry.”

Abby glanced out the window at the passing of countless bare trees. If she had been looking at Harper, the next words might not have made it out of her. “Part of me wants to just tell you its OK. I saw the intense pressure your family put on you. I didn’t truly understand it until I saw it in person this week. But the other part of me, maybe the more important part of me, needs to tell you… that you hurt me. Even leaving your family out of it… you left me behind with your friends. It was like I was an afterthought”

“I know. I don’t know how to be the “me” that you know and the “me” that they know at the same time. I thought I'd figure it out once we got there. But after we nearly got caught downstairs I - I realized I needed to hold back the way I feel for you and I didn't know how to do that. I took it too far. I’m so sorry, Abby. I was terrible to you. I meant it when I said I would spend the rest of my life making it up to you. I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone, and I will do whatever I have to do to show you that.” Harper glanced at Abby, tears welling in her eyes, before refocusing on the road in front of them.

“I love you, too Harper. I’m going to need some time to digest all of this. But I need you to know you could have been honest with me.”

“I know, and I don’t deserve you or your forgiveness. If other people saw this, I mean... other than all of the people at the party that did... if they knew what I did, they would think you should break up with me. And... and maybe they are right. Maybe I deserve that.”

A tear rolled down Harper’s cheek as she realized what was really at stake now that they were alone.

“Hey, stop that. I’m not worried about who understands it. I love you, Harper. That’s all that matters. We’ll figure the rest out.”

Abby reached across the center console and rested her hand on top of Harper’s gently, fingers intertwined, as if for the very first time. There was still tension in the air, but with their hands touching Abby could feel her love for Harper, even after all they had been through.

There was a long silence following as the car passed exit after exit on the highway. An hour or so later, Abby broke the silence. “Do you think your parents really came around to the idea so quickly? I mean, for everything you’ve told me about them, it seemed… remarkably quick. Not to mention the fact that they may not be my biggest fans after what happened at the mall.”

“Honestly, I don’t know what to think about it yet. I think it being Christmas probably helped, I guess. I don’t know where we go from here. I don’t know what they are actually thinking. But it doesn’t matter, it’s all out now. And as far as you’re concerned, once they get to know the real you, the you that I know, I'm sure they will love you, too.”

“I hope so. I mean, if they hated me your mom probably wouldn’t have asked me to join the family photo.”

“That damn photo.”

As the weight of their conversation began to fade, the pair caught up on a podcast for the rest of the drive home. It was a welcome distraction from the stress as the scenery never seemed to change as the car continued to wind through the hills of the western Pennsylvania interstate.

Eventually, the scenery finally looked familiar to Abby again as they approached the city. Soon enough, they crossed the 40th Street bridge and began to scan the streets of lower Lawrenceville for an open parking spot.

“There! There!” Abby called out when she spotted a spot that would be a quick walk to their 3rd floor walk-up apartment.

Harper parallel parked skillfully and they made their way into the apartment they shared. They didn’t get further than the entryway before dropping all of their belongings and immediately collapsing onto opposite ends of the couch. The sun was already starting to set in the early evening sky.

“I'm glad to be home," Harper said with a sigh. "I can’t believe I have to go back to work already tomorrow,” she complained, thankful they had left the house so clean earlier in the week.

“You always say news never stops; I’m still surprised you were able to get off for the holiday to begin with.”

“Yeah, I know. I’m grateful to have had the time off. Even if it was a disaster.”

“I still have two weeks until I’m expected back at school. I have to work on my dissertation here and there, I have to meet up with John, and I should probably check in with all of my clients to make sure all of the pets are OK. I still don’t know why John’s so fascinated with the fish. But for tonight, I just want to be home. I’ll put the leftovers away if you cue up something on Hulu. I think we have a few shows to catch up on. I heard there's a new movie on there, too.”

“Deal. That sounds perfect. Do you want a drink?”

”Yeah, please. I think I will be having several,” Abby replied.

“And I will get you each and every one you want, babe."

Harper sat down on one end of the couch with two beers in hand. Abby sat close to her, took a drink for herself, and leaned in under Harper’s arm. They fit together the same way they always had. Harper placed a kiss atop Abby’s head and paused to appreciate the moment. It felt comfortable and normal, but at the same time, different. Things would never be the same as they had before the Christmas trip. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sunday, December 27, 2020

When Abby woke up the next morning, Harper was already gone. She spent a few minutes lying motionless before even rolling over to pick up her phone. After such an uncomfortable trip, she was happy to be alone in the comfort of her own bed. The winter daylight illuminated the room around her, and she could tell it was going to be a briskly cold day as soon as one arm tentatively emerged from under the covers.

She picked up her phone and her home screen confirmed her suspicions: cloudy and 12°F, another dull, cold winter day. A longtime resident of Pittsburgh at this point, she still wondered how one city could be so warm and sunny in the summer and so utterly miserable in the winter.

She had a text from John:

_Lunch?_

She thought about it quickly, unsure if she needed a day alone or if she would benefit from spending some time with a friend.

**I guess the least I can do is buy you lunch after the last few days.**

_In that case, I’ll be picking somewhere very expensive. I have expensive taste, you know._

**Hey, I may not have given Harper the ring, but my bank account still took the hit.**

_Condado @ 2:00? I think you need a marg._

**Sure. See you then.**

With time to kill until meeting John for lunch, Abby mustered the energy to roll out of the warm bed and made her way downstairs. The coffee maker was already set up with a filter, coffee, and a waiting cup. Nearby was a sticky note with a heart drawn on it. She smiled knowing Harper had been thinking of her when she left for work earlier that morning.

Fresh coffee and a leftover Christmas cookie in hand, Abby powered on her laptop and checked her school email account to see if she had received the feedback she was waiting for from her doctoral advisor. Surprisingly, quite a few emails had accumulated over the holiday break. She wondered for a moment if these people were working to escape their own family drama, too. No matter their motivations, she was happy to sink her mind back into her work for a few hours.

Naturally, right when she finally felt she was making progress, it was time to put away her laptop and meet John for lunch. She practically had to climb over all of the still-packed bags from their trip that were scattered about the entryway in order to get out of the front door. She laughed quietly to herself imagining Harper trying to navigate her way through the luggage in the dark earlier that morning as she made the quick walk down Butler Street to the restaurant.

“Well, how is… everything?” John asked somewhat hesitantly as Abby settled onto her chair at the high-top table. The restaurant was mostly empty. But then again, it was the middle of the afternoon. 

“Ugh. What a freaking whirlwind. I still can't believe any of that really happened. Seriously, what the fuck.” Abby knew she had a lot more to say but still couldn’t really find the words.

“And that is exactly why I thought you needed a margarita.”

Just as John finished speaking, their server appeared as if on cue to take their order.

“I really don’t even know what to say about the whole thing,” Abby said to John, redirecting the conversation after their server departed. “On one hand, I get it. I love Harper, and on some level, I understand what she is going through. And on the other…” she paused for a moment to make sure she didn’t minimize her feelings about what had happened, “I can’t believe she dragged me through all of that. You don’t even know the half of everything that happened.”

“Yeah, I can understand -” John started, but Abby cut him off before he could say anything else.

“And thank you for coming to my rescue. I know a Christmas road trip wasn’t exactly what you had planned.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m sure over time you can buy me enough food and coffee to make up for it,” he responded, equal parts serious and sarcastic.

“I didn’t know about what happened with your dad. I’m sorry that happened to you. I had no idea,” Abby said, trying to acknowledge the kindness her friend had showed her on Christmas Eve.

“It’s not something I think about much anymore, it was a long time ago. I’m just glad Harper’s journey will at least be better than that.” John fidgeted a bit as he spoke and glanced away from Abby, clearly looking to change the subject.

Their server arrived with drinks just in time to break the tension. John and Abby each took a long sip from their beverages right away.

“See, doesn’t tequila make it feel better?” John teased, as if the whole world would look brighter after only one sip.

“I’m not sure about that, but I’m willing to try,” Abby responded, laughing under her own breath. She was right to come out to lunch, it was good to spend time with a friend.

The conversation drifted naturally to less serious topics. The week between Christmas and New Year’s left lots of time for binge watching, so John had some new recommendations to share; and he still wasn’t sure if ultra-suede had been the right choice.

After a few tacos and a few more laughs, John asked gently, “So… what are you going to do with that very expensive patriarchal symbol you bought last week?”

“I think I’m going to keep it somewhere safe for now and see what happens. I really thought we were ready, but apparently not.”

“But that doesn’t mean you never will be.” Even John wasn’t sure if this was a statement or a question.

“No, I don’t think so. Just not yet. It feels like we’ve known each other forever but it really has only been a year. Evidently, we still have more to learn about each other than I thought.”

“You’re right, there’s no rush to get the government involved in your relationship,” he joked as he drank the last bit of his drink. He took an extra sip to make sure he had gotten every last bit from the glass. Right at that second, with the glass tilted high above his head, the receipt was dropped off on the table in front of them.

“Thanks for coming in, have a great night,” their server said as they shuffled by towards the other occupied table nearby.

Abby signed the receipt and they both got up from the table and prepared to head back out into the winter cold. “Thanks for this,” she said, looking around to make sure she had grabbed her phone, keys, and wallet.

“Any time you want to buy me lunch, I’m in. I’m working from home for the rest of the year. Nobody comes into the office this week anyway, so I’m around if you want to hang out again. Oh, and I almost forgot to ask. Do you two have New Year’s plans yet?”

“You mean aside from not proposing? Not really.” Abby was ready to joke about it, but only on her own terms.

They walked down the steps of the restaurant out onto the street where just a week ago Abby had told John of her plans to propose. It was ironic really, in an unfortunate sort of way.

“One of my friends is having a New Year's Eve party, if you’re looking for something to do. No pressure, but it should be a fun night.”

“Let me talk to Harper about it and I’ll let you know. Alright. I’ll see you later.” Abby turned away from John and started to walk back towards her apartment but quickly turned back towards him. “Hey, John, wait. What happened to the fish?”

John continued walking away from her, barely breaking stride, “I took care of it!” he called over his shoulder.

For some reason, she didn’t really believe him.

Abby walked back to their apartment quickly, trying to minimize her time out in the cold. Once she reached the apartment, she picked her laptop back up and settled in on the couch under their bright orange blanket, waiting for the laptop to help warm her up as she worked.

When Harper’s name flashed on Abby’s phone screen that evening, she smiled involuntarily.

_Hey baby, I’m helping the team out with a story that’s on a deadline tonight. I should be wrapping up in the next hour or so. What are you thinking for dinner? <3_

**Do you want to just eat the Christmas Eve leftovers? The food your parents had catered was excellent and we really didn’t get to enjoy it. Plus, I had lunch with John, so I’m not that hungry.**

_Sounds good to me. See you soon. Love you._

Harper always closed messages to Abby with either “love you” or “<3”, even when it wasn’t necessary. After reading Harper’s words, Abby caught herself wondering for a moment if messages to Connor had once been written the same way. She really wasn’t jealous of him. Now that they were back in their own environment, she knew for sure she didn’t need to be. The fact that she and Harper had been together for a year and Harper hadn’t even mentioned Connor suggested to her that he really wasn’t a part of her life anymore. But even if he were, or would be someday, she really did trust Harper. _After all, being friends with your exes is part of being a lesbian,_ she thought to herself as she tried to push the thoughts from her mind and shift her focus back to her work. 

Abby had been agonizing over the same three sentences in her dissertation for what felt like hours when she heard footsteps approaching their apartment door. Harper opened the door, looking somewhat frazzled after a lengthy day. She approached Abby and planted a quick kiss on her forehead.

“Hey,” Abby said, still mentally checked in to her writing.

Harper went upstairs and changed from her work clothes into something more comfortable. Her day at work had been long, as they all tended to be. Working in journalism was stressful, to say the least. It required her to be always on her toes and consumed so much of her life that getting home to Abby each evening felt calming in the way she imagined a $650 spa treatment felt for Tipper. She took a deep breath and stared at herself in the mirror for a moment before returning back downstairs.

“I know it’s stupid, but I missed you today,” Harper said as she walked down the stairs into the kitchen where Abby was already separating leftover food onto two plates. Harper wrapped her arms around Abby from behind, leaned downward, and kissed the side of Abby's head. Abby stopped what she was doing and leaned into Harper’s embrace.

“I missed you while we were at your parents,” Abby said, tentatively, emphasizing the word 'you' as if to point out that the woman at the Caldwell’s house barely resembled the woman Abby knew and loved. She meant it as a joke, but perhaps it held a bit too much truth, too.

Harper let go of Abby and furrowed her brow not knowing how to respond.

“Too soon…” Abby realized that while she could sneak in a quick joke with John about it, maybe she and Harper weren’t ready for that just yet.

Harper pulled Abby close again, this time from the front, looking straight into her eyes. “I just don’t know what to say other than I’m sorry and I love you.”

Harper leaned down for a kiss, which Abby returned by stretching up on her tiptoes, a position she had become all too familiar with over the last year. Without saying anything else, the pair continued to kiss for a few moments until Harper backed away.

“I really like where this is going, but I didn’t have time for lunch today and I am starving.”

Abby laughed gently and put Harper’s plate into the microwave, “Yeah, how was your first day back?”

Harper told her girlfriend all about her busy day and Abby in turn provided the highlights of her lunch with John. Once they finished eating their feast of leftovers, Abby moved back into the living room, sat down at the end of the couch, and changed the TV from the Netflix pause screen to the evening’s episode of Jeopardy. At some point, watching the show together had become a part of their evening routine during the week. Abby was always excited to show off her knowledge when the inevitable art history category presented itself; Harper, in turn, excelled at answering questions related to political processes and current events. They never kept score of who answered more questions correctly, but they laughed together any time one of them answered a question incorrectly with utmost confidence, which happened frequently.

Harper laid down on the couch with her head in Abby’s lap. Abby ran her fingers through Harper’s long brown hair while they watched TV. Eventually, Harper fell asleep, as she often did safely nestled in the comfort of Abby’s lap.

This was the comfortable routine they knew and loved, even if it still felt a bit precarious thanks to the memories of their trip so fresh in the back of their minds. They would take it one day at a time and this had been day one. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Monday, December 28, 2020

“I’m surprised you’re still here,” Abby called out as she stumbled down the stairs the next morning, having just woken up a few moments earlier. She hadn’t completely oriented herself to the reality of the day yet, but she was aware enough to know that it was well past the time Harper often left for the office.

“Morning baby,” Harper greeted her with warm, genuine excitement in her voice, “I’m covering the year-end county Board of Elections meeting in a bit, so I’m just working from here until I have to go downtown. I have no idea why they waited until this week to have the meeting.”

“Thanks for making coffee,” Abby said as she walked by Harper, placing a quick hand on Harper’s shoulder as she passed by.

After filling her Carnegie Mellon University mug with fresh coffee, Abby sunk into the couch in the living room and stared intently at her phone, scrolling through social media to see what she missed while she was sleeping. Unsurprisingly, aside from a few newly uploaded gifs of her favorite fictional couple, there wasn’t much new to see. The week between Christmas and New Year’s tended to be that way. It was a welcome change from the end of the fall term and the pre-holiday rush that had kept her busy prior to their trip. Thanks to the extended semester break, this was one of the few times Abby could loosen her grip on reality.

“When do you think you’ll be back? Want to get pizza for dinner tonight? I’ve been craving Spak Brothers,” Abby asked Harper, hopeful she’d agree.

“It’s Monday. Aren’t they closed on Monday?” Harper responded tentatively from her seat just outside the kitchen, not wanting to dash Abby’s pizza dreams completely so soon after she had woken up.

“Shit. I forgot. I thought it was Tuesday since you went to work yesterday.”

“Nope. Monday. Definitely Monday. How about pizza tomorrow, and we make it a date night?” Harper tried not to sound too excited, but her enthusiasm was clear in the tone of her voice. She had thought of an idea for a winter date night weeks ago, but they hadn’t had an opportunity for a date night since.

“I guess I can wait until then.”

“I hope you can; I have an idea for a date night. Do you want to know now, or do you want it to be a surprise?”

“Well, considering even the day of the week is a surprise to me, you may as well make it a surprise, too.”

“Can’t wait,” Harper responded as she stood up and began to pack her things. “I’m going to get going, but I’ll see you tonight.”

Harper approached the couch and gave Abby a quick kiss on her way out the door. In order to kiss her girlfriend, Harper had to crouch down so low she practically had to kneel on the floor. It was a wonder she didn’t fall over with her work bag slung over her shoulder disrupting her balance. As soon as she regained her balance from crouching down to kiss Abby, she had to once again navigate the bags sprawled across the entry way to actually get out of their apartment. _This_ , she thought to herself, _is what all those yoga and Pilates classes had been preparing me for._

When Abby’s cup of coffee had finally taken effect, she rose from the comfort of the couch and went back upstairs to get dressed for the day. She reached into the top drawer of her dresser and immediately realized she was currently wearing her last clean white tank. She hadn’t yet decided what she was going to do today, but the day's agenda needed to include doing laundry. She pulled a comfortable sweatshirt over her head and went back downstairs to finally remove their luggage from just inside the front door.

After lugging everything upstairs, she began to sort through all of the dirty clothes. There were a few jackets and dresses that needed to be dry cleaned, but that was most definitely a task for another day. She piled the jackets and dresses on a chair in the corner for now. If she were lucky, they would make it to the cleaners and back by February. By the time she had emptied each bag, she had three piles of laundry in front of her. Before starting the first load, she unpacked the rest of the shoes and accessories, too. They really had taken an unreasonable stuff to the Caldwell's for a brief five-day trip.

As she put away the last of the toiletries in the bathroom closet, she realized that something she had expected to find in her bag hadn’t been there. Abby dropped her makeup bag on the floor instead of putting it away. She spun around instantly and sprinted back into the bedroom. She opened her bag and looked through every pocket. Empty. She looked through Harper’s bag, too. Nothing. She dug through each pocket again, surely it was in there and she was just missing it. It had to be in there.

One of Abby’s clear childhood memories was her mother’s ability to find whatever Abby had misplaced. Whether it was a toy when she was a toddler or her calculus assignment in high school, with her mother’s assistance the missing item was always found quickly. She’d ask Abby, “Where did you have it last?” Abby never really understood the question. If she knew where she had seen it last, it wouldn’t be lost.

Abby thought back to where she had seen it last. It had been in her bag. She was sure of it. She had gotten it out at one point just to look at it, but she was certain she put it back in her bag.

Just then, she realized where it was. She could picture it clear as day.

The ring wasn’t in her bag. It was on the nightstand. In Jane’s room. In the Caldwell’s house. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Monday, December 28, 2020 (cont'd) and Tuesday, December 29, 2020

Abby frantically picked up her phone and called John, feeling a wave of nervousness radiate through her body. 

“Hello, have you called to dump more shit upon this day?” John answered in a confusingly upbeat tone of voice given his choice of words.

“No, uh, why? What’s going on?”

“I just got off of a conference call for work and they are looking for me to take on more authors next year. I don’t know how they expect me to find and sign that many more authors, let alone give their life stories the attention they deserve. I am feeling quite stressed in this particular moment.”

“That sucks, I’m sorry. But doesn’t that mean you’re doing a good job if they want you do to more?”

“Ugh. Anyway, what’s up?” John didn’t answer Abby’s question. He had a tendency to do that.

“Well… I lost the ring.”

“What do you mean you lost it?”

“Um, I guess lost isn’t the right word. I know where it is, it just isn’t with me.”

“You didn’t?” John gasped audibly having put the pieces together.

“Yeah, I did," Abby paused, not wanting to actually verbalize what she had done. "I left it at the Caldwell’s. When we were leaving I was nervous, and happy to get out of there, and I’m almost certain it’s downstairs in Jane’s room...” Abby’s sentence trailed off quietly.

“I can’t wait to see how this plays out.”

“I don’t know what to do. I don’t want Harper to know, of course. And I don’t particularly want any of the Caldwell’s to find it if they haven’t already. Shit, maybe they already found it.”

“Well, at least you know it will be safe there. You know, in the only room in that house without a lock.”

“I’m sure it will be fine; I just don’t know how I’ll get it back. I don’t have any of their phone numbers. And even if I did, I really don’t want to cold call Ted and Tipper and spring the fact that their daughter, who was deeply closeted until four days ago, is so very queer she’s actually going to marry another woman. I mean, hopefully marry, that is.”

“Let me think about it and we’ll talk later. I might have an idea,” John said as he hung up the phone. He often ended his phone conversations abruptly, but Abby was used to it by now.

Abby sat down on the edge of the bed, put her head in her hands, and took a few deep breaths.

*******************

“Give me a call when you’re leaving with the pizza,” Harper asked Abby the next afternoon as she was thinking through her plan for their date night. She had been able to sneak out of work early and was already home in their apartment starting to get ready. Thankfully, Abby had gone out for a bit leaving Harper time and space to prepare her little surprise for Abby.

“I will. I’m walking in Schenley Park now. I’ll call and order when I’m leaving and then pick it up on my way home. I think I’ll be back around 6 o'clock, depending on how long the pizza takes.”

“OK baby, see you then. Love you,” Harper said as she hung up the phone. This date night didn’t hold any particular significance, but she wanted to do something special for Abby to remind her how much she loved her.

While Harper was preparing back at home, Abby was walking along the top of Flagstaff Hill in Schenley Park. From the top of the hill, she could see the tops of a few downtown buildings in the distance. The sun had shone brightly that afternoon for the first time in what felt like weeks. Abby had literally jumped at the chance to get outside and breathe some fresh outdoor air, even if it still had quite the chill to it.

The sun was beginning to set behind the distant city, triggering beautiful purple and pink tones in the stagnant clouds. Abby stood motionless at the top of the hill and took in the scenery for a moment. Thoughts of Harper immediately crept into her mind. She wished her girlfriend were there to see the sunset over the city with her. _Perhaps this could be a good spot for her proposal_ , she thought. They always enjoyed spending time in the park together. In fact, Harper had given Abby the necklace she wore every day when they picnicked under the Panther Hollow Bridge back in the summer. 

Just then, a car horn blasted from the street below, breaking Abby from her thoughts and bringing her back to reality. Abby couldn’t believe she was already back to envisioning her proposal again. She shook her head slightly and began to walk down the hill. She was due home soon.

A bit later, Abby walked in the apartment door, pizza in hand. She was unsure of what to expect for the evening, but was looking forward to spending time with Harper. Abby found Harper sitting on the living room floor. Harper had cleared the floor of all of the usual furniture and spread out their striped picnic blanket on the floor. Candles burned nearby, lighting the room in a soft, warm glow. Next to Harper was their small cooler filled with ice and beer bottles in the way you’d expect to see wine chilled on ice.

“I thought we could have an indoor picnic,” Harper suggested, “and pizza is the perfect addition.”

Abby broke into a genuine, ear to ear smile. There was no way Harper could have known that not even an hour ago she was standing in the park daydreaming about their summer picnic. She and Harper had such an unexplainable connection, sometimes she couldn’t even believe it was real. This was one of those times.

Abby sat down and placed the pizza on the coffee table. Harper had already set out plates and utensils for them. Harper opened the first beer and handed it to Abby. “I remember you wanted a beer."

"What?"

"When we were at Fratty’s with my friends last week, I remember you wanted to get a beer and Connor handed you a shot instead,” Harper confessed.

Abby looked confused for a second as she tried to remember it herself. She had already tried to eliminate some of the smaller moments of the trip from her memory.

“I wanted to get you that beer. So, I bought your three favorites and then I bought three new ones I thought you’d like, too. I know it’s nothing fancy but-”

“It’s perfect, thank you,” Abby said as she leaned over to give Harper a kiss. Abby was surprised that Harper had remembered such a small detail from their trip when it had seemed at the time as though she was paying no mind to Abby at all. The more Abby thought about it, though, she was beginning to realize that maybe Riley was right. Maybe the versions of Harper she had seen were both real, and the Harper she knew had been there at the Caldwell’s all along, too. 

After a few slices of pizza and a couple of drinks each, the women found themselves laughing and having fun just being together. At some point, they had turned on some music and Tegan and Sara’s newest album was now playing in the background.

Abby was sitting, still on the floor, with her legs crossed when Harper shifted herself to sit in Abby’s lap, straddling her.

“I love you,” Harper said, looking straight down into Abby’s eyes.

“I love you too,” Abby replied, leaning up into a kiss. 

What started as a few gentle kisses soon turned deep and passionate. Harper ran her hands through Abby’s hair as they kissed.

“Can we move this somewhere more comfortable?” Abby interjected after a few moments, “This is killing my neck. And my legs. Either you're too tall or I'm too short. Or both.”

They both laughed as Harper rolled off of Abby onto the floor in a manner that could not be described as graceful. Abby stood up and moved to sit in the center of the couch. Harper joined her, sitting next to her for a moment before putting her hands on Abby’s shoulders and guiding her downward. Harper laid herself on top of Abby and kissed her intensely, pausing only to tuck her hair behind her ear.

Abby kissed Harper back while running her hands slowly up and down Harper’s sides. She loved the feeling of Harper on top of her and she wanted more. Unfortunately, just as Abby was about to pull Harper’s top over her head, Harper’s phone began to ring in the background.

“Go ahead,” Abby said, somewhat out of breath, “It might be work, I understand.”

Harper stood up, took a moment to compose herself, and walked over to the counter where her phone had been sitting. A picture of Tipper was flashing on the screen.

“It’s my mom, I’ll call her tomorrow.” Harper said, irritated the moment had been broken. As soon as she announced who had been calling, she wished she hadn’t said it. With the mention of Tipper, the mood in the room had changed dramatically as memories of their trip to the Caldwell's bubbled to the surface of both of their minds. Nothing kills a vibe faster than discussing parents, especially after what they had just been through.

Harper returned to the living room and snuggled up to Abby, who was now upright in the corner of the couch. Harper brought the picnic blanket up off the floor to use as a cover while Abby cracked open a couple more drinks and reached for the remote control. Abby kissed the top of Harper’s head after she settled in under the blanket and wrapped her arm around her girlfriend, happy for things to be beginning to feel normal again.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wednesday, December 30, 2020

Early the next morning, Harper’s alarm broke her peaceful sleep. She fumbled to snooze the blaring sound as quickly as possible. She knew she needed to wake up for work but didn’t want to disturb Abby sleeping deeply beside her.

Harper almost always woke up as soon as her alarm went off, but she typically pressed the ‘snooze’ button anyway. She liked to spend the first seven minutes of her day wrapped up in bed with Abby. When her alarm would sound again her day could begin, but until then, she had a few moments to appreciate how beautiful her girlfriend looked when she was asleep. Harper pulled herself close to Abby and rubbed her back gently. She couldn't think of anything other than how grateful she was for Abby’s love.

*Beep* * Beep* *Beep*

It was amazing how quickly those first seven minutes of each day went by. Harper hesitated for one more second before planting a quick kiss on Abby's head, carefully extracting herself from the warm comfort of their bed, and beginning her morning routine.

By that afternoon, Harper had been at work for hours already. Abby, on the other hand, was right where Harper had left her. She was curled up in bed reading a novel she had been trying to carve out time to read for weeks. One of the many difficult aspects of academia was the fact that it seemed to suck most of the joy out of reading for pleasure.

On this occasion, though, she was completely lost in a fictional world. She had turned her phone to silent and her nightstand was loaded with a handful of half-eaten snacks. Outside of the arch window, a puffy, white snow was falling onto the street below. It was picturesque scenes like this that helped to make the long, cold winter bearable.

As she looked back from the window toward her book, she noticed the brightness of her phone screen out of the corner of her eye. John was calling. She fumbled around looking for a way to mark her page before quickly sticking an empty Hershey Kiss wrapper in between the pages of the book. Abby may not have been big on Christmas, but she did find that red and green wrapped candies somehow tasted better than the year-round versions. She set the book down and answered the phone just before it would have transferred the call to voicemail.

“Hey,” Abby coughed into the phone. She didn’t realize it, but she hadn’t spoken to anyone all day.

“What, did I wake you up?”

“No… I’m up,” Abby responded, still unable to stabilize her voice.

“I have been thinking about your ring problem. And I have been thinking about my writer problem. And I think they may have the same solution,” John was clearly building up to something here.

“What do you mean?”

“Jane Caldwell, that’s what I mean,” John stated, matter of fact, as if the answer were crystal clear.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wednesday, December 30, 2020 (cont'd)

“John was wondering what we’re doing for New Year’s,” Abby asked Harper over dinner that night. The pair were sitting at their kitchen table in what could only be described as mismatched outfits. Harper was still dressed from her workday in black dress pants and a light blue silk-looking blouse. Abby, however, hadn’t left their apartment after her day of reading and was still wearing the sweatpants and tank top she had woken up in that morning. Her hair was unkempt but somehow still looked perfect.

“Yeah, I guess we haven’t really discussed it. I don’t know. What do you want to do?” Harper asked Abby, “I have to work, but I should be home by 7 o'clock at the latest and then I have New Year’s Day off.”

“John’s friend is having a party. He invited us but I don’t have my heart set on it. It’s in Shadyside, so we’d either have to drive or Uber, neither of which are ideal on New Year’s Eve.”

“Honestly, I’ll do whatever you want to do as long as I get to kiss you at midnight.”

“I’m really not feeling going to John’s friends party. I mean, I don’t think we’ll know anyone.”

“That’s fine with me, babe. I just want to start the new year by your side. Do you want to do something else? We could go downtown and see the fireworks if you want to, or we could just hang out here. I can think of some things we can do here that we couldn’t do at John’s friend’s party,” Harper smirked at Abby as the words came out of her mouth.

Abby finished twirling her last bit of spaghetti onto her fork and looked up at Harper. “I would like to do some of those things,” she said with a knowing smile, “I’ll text John and let him know we’re going to hang out here instead. I was non-committal at best, so I’m sure he won’t be surprised. He did ask me about your sister, though.”

“Sloane? What about her? I haven’t heard from her since Christmas and I don’t know if I want to call her. I’m still pissed that she outed me in the way she did.”

“No, no - Jane. He wants to talk to her more about her book,” Abby responded as she got up from the table, collected their plates, and took them into the kitchen. She opened the half-full dishwasher to find the dishes were somehow taking up all of the available space inside. Abby stared at the unorganized chaos for a moment before resigning herself to the fact she was going to have to rearrange all of it. 

“Seriously?” Harper was genuinely surprised. Jane’s novel had been her pet project for years, but Harper never thought it had much merit. In truth, she only understood the basic premise of the book, even after years of hearing about it.

“Yeah, what do you think?” Abby asked as she loaded a few pots and pans onto the bottom rack.

“In all honesty, I’ve never really thought about her novel actually going anywhere. I can’t believe he’d be interested. But as long as he’s serious about it, I’ll text you her number to give to him.”

“He is. He told me he has been thinking about how good the premise of her story is since they discussed it on Christmas. Apparently, they are looking for the next new world that people can really dive into and escape from reality. Stuff like that always tends to be popular, you know, like all the vampire stuff used to be.”

“Well, we always did say Jane was disconnected from reality.”

“Seriously, Harper?”

“What?” Harper looked at her girlfriend, unsure what Abby’s quick reaction was about.

Abby knew Harper didn’t take Jane seriously; none of the Caldwell’s did. But Abby felt somewhat protective of her, considering she had been genuinely welcoming to her. She was irritated that Harper was so continually dismissive of Jane, but that was not a problem she was going to solve tonight.

“Well, can I have her number or not?”

A moment later, just as she placed the last of the cups on the top rack of the dishwasher, Abby had a text message from Harper with Jane’s number.

Success.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wednesday, December 30, 2020 (cont'd)

Abby texted John right away to let him know step one of their plan had been a success.

**I got Jane’s number and I clued Harper into the fact that you are going to contact Jane about her book.**

_Thanks. I haven’t exactly decided how I want to play this from here. What do you think?_

**What do you mean you haven’t decided? This is your plan!**

Abby hadn't been aware of it until exactly this moment, but John’s plan didn’t yet have a step two.

_I want to set up a couple meetings with her after the first of the year to discuss her book in more detail and take some notes that I can pass along to my coordinators. But that doesn’t really help you._

**No, it doesn’t. But I think if she or her parents found the ring, she probably won’t be able to keep it a secret.**

_Y_ _eah, I got the impression secrets probably don’t stay secret with Jane._

_How about this…_

_I’ll reach out first by text and just check in first. That will give her the opportunity to come clean… you know… if she does have a secret now._

**I don’t have a better plan, so that will have to work, I guess. I hate the idea of waiting.**

_Then you shouldn’t have left the ring there!_

**Thanks John. HELPFUL.**

_Did you decide if you’re coming out for New Year’s Eve?_

**I think we already did enough coming out recently, so we’re gonna stay home.**

_I knew you would. Lame._

Abby still couldn’t believe she had left Harper’s engagement ring at the Caldwell’s house. She was tempted to just get in the car, drive back out there, and get it. She still had more than a week until the spring semester began and she could make most of the trip when Harper was at work. Unfortunately, that would require facing the reality of the situation head on with Tipper and Ted, and that was something she wasn’t yet ready to do. Abby wanted to be considerate of the fact that they only learned their daughter was a lesbian a week prior. Showing up on their doorstep to claim a misplaced engagement ring didn’t seem like something they would be ready for and Abby wanted to be respectful of that.

“Thanks for doing all of the laundry yesterday,” Harper said to Abby, thinking she was continuing their conversation.

Abby continued to stare at her phone and offered no response.

“I was going to do it tonight, but now that I don’t have to, I can run to the store and get some things for tomorrow night instead,” Harper continued, “Should I pick up champagne? Do we want to do a charcuterie board as dinner? Do you want to come with me?”

“Yeah, I’ll come with you. I haven’t been out at all today. But, you know, that would require me to actually get dressed.”

Abby knew she didn’t need to accompany Harper to the grocery store, but she was willing to brave the cold to spend time with her girlfriend. Even simple, everyday errands were enjoyable when they were together.

“I want to change my clothes, too, then I’ll be ready to go,” Harper said as she started up the stairs, taking them two at a time. Once upstairs in their bedroom, she quickly stripped down to her underwear. She tossed her dress clothes into the hamper and pulled a warm, knit sweater over her head. She retrieved a pair of tight-fitting jeans from the closet and put them on.

Abby arrived upstairs just after Harper finished getting re-dressed.

“Damn, I missed it,” Abby said to her girlfriend, imagining what she had looked like only moments before. 

“I will wear whatever you want tomorrow night,” Harper replied with a wink. She was hoping their New Year’s Eve party for two would include celebrations of an intimate variety.

Abby just shook her head and smiled at Harper as she got dressed, too. She was half tempted to push Harper onto their bed and have her way with her right then. That, she thought, could wait for tomorrow night.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thursday, December 31, 2020

“Did I really just see you yawn?” Harper called to Abby from across the apartment on New Year’s Eve.

“No way. You didn’t see anything,” Abby lied. She had no excuse for being tired. She had slept past ten that morning and in all honestly hadn’t done anything physically tiring since they returned from the Caldwell’s days ago.

“Abby! I know what I saw. It’s only 8 o’clock - it’s still four hours until midnight!”

“I’m awake. I’m awake!” Abby got up, walked over to Harper, and gave her a quick kiss to try to convince her.

“Are you ready to start our project?” Harper asked, “I’m hungry.”

Harper and Abby had gone to Giant Eagle the night prior to get something special for their New Year’s Eve celebration at home. They didn’t have anything specific in mind, but as soon as they walked into the grocery store and saw the prepared sushi, Harper’s mind took off. Abby had lobbied for them to order in, but Harper was interested in more of a DIY solution.

“Yeah, I’m ready whenever you are. Do you mind that I’m just wearing sweats?” Abby asked, unsure if she should have gotten more dressed up for the evening. She had showered that afternoon but considering she hadn’t actually gone anywhere, she was dressed in comfortable pants, a CMU sweatshirt, and brown moccasin slippers.

“Not at all, babe. I think you look sexy in everything. And that’s even more true when I know you’re comfortable. I was actually just thinking I want to change out of my work clothes before we get started.”

Harper bounded up the stairs to change her clothes. She returned a moment later wearing black yoga pants and one of Abby’s tee shirts. Despite their height difference, there were a few pieces of clothing they could share. Abby smiled from ear to ear when she saw Harper wearing her shirt. It feels good when someone steals your tee shirt.

Abby retrieved the ingredients out of the refrigerator while Harper was upstairs. She had made rice earlier that afternoon, not really knowing exactly what to do differently for sushi rice. After setting everything out on the counter, she began to carefully cut open an avocado and slice it on a cutting board in front of her. Upon returning to the kitchen in her casual clothes Harper began to cut the seafood they were planning to put inside the rolls, being careful to wash her hands often.

“Want to put on some music?” Abby asked.

“Sure. What are you thinking?”

Abby shrugged. She didn’t have anything in mind, she just thought some background music would be nice.

“Hey Google. Play some New Year’s music,” Harper asked their digital assistant.

_Playing New Year’s Eve 2021 playlist on Spotify._

“How many versions of Auld Lang Syne do you think will be on here?” Abby joked, “I think we should take a drink every time one comes on.”

“If we do that, we’ll never make it to midnight!”

After fifteen more minutes of ingredient prep, they were ready to try to assemble their meal.

“Have you ever done this before?” Abby asked Harper, knowing there were still a lot of details of her girlfriend’s past she didn’t know about.

“No. I never have, but I’ve always wanted to try.”

“Considering we had to buy everything including the rolling mat, I still think it would have been easier to just get takeout; but I’m interested to see how this goes.”

Abby very carefully assembled what she thought would be a simple California roll. She laid everything out in front of her and began to try to roll it together with Harper’s watchful eye over her shoulder. She had rolled it about three-quarters of a turn when everything just kind of... collapsed.

“Oh, shoot,” Harper said, “not bad for our first attempt, though.”

Abby re-aligned all the ingredients and tried again. This one was somehow worse than the first attempt.

“See,” Abby said, laughing, “I told you this would be more difficult than you thought.”

“Let me try a couple,” Harper said as she nudged Abby out of the way to try her hand. Harper’s was only marginally better than Abby’s. She had miscalculated her rolling, though, and the whole thing nearly rolled onto the floor.

Harper and Abby took turns trying to roll up the sushi time after time, never really getting it to look quite right. After about a dozen tries, Harper finally got one rolled together and stopped to appreciate her victory.

“Look, baby, I did it!” Harper was beaming with pride looking at the mostly cylindrical rice covered roll, not realizing she wasn’t yet done.

Harper picked up their sharpest knife and tried to cut the roll into pieces, only to have it completely disassemble itself right in front of her eyes.

“I think we are offending every sushi chef on earth,” Abby teased as Harper stared at the mess that they had made.

“I agree. Now I understand why sushi is so expensive.” Harper was still staring at the mangled ingredients in front of them. Somehow, they had gotten rice everywhere; on the countertop, on the floor, in the sink. She even picked a few grains off Abby’s sweatshirt. Harper started laughing at the absurdity of it and could not stop.

“How about we make these into sushi bowls instead?” Abby asked.

“I’m glad you suggested that, I’m starving,” Harper replied as she grabbed two gray bowls from the cabinet and began to load hers up with food. 

“You know, if we had a dog, they would eat all of this rice off the floor for us so we don’t have to sweep it up,” Abby suggested as she gestured to the mess around them. They had hypothetically discussed expanding their family in the past but had never settled on anything concrete.

“Do you want to get a dog this year? I think I’d be open to that if you really want to. With my long hours I know a lot of the work would fall on you, though.”

Harper and Abby sat at the kitchen table and dug into their unplanned sushi bowls. The presentation was informal, but they still tasted good. Abby loaded hers up with soy sauce and slid the bottle across the table to Harper.

“I’d like to at least consider it. I love sitting client’s pets, but I’ve really missed having a pet of my own. Being in school for so many years I haven’t had a pet since my parents…” Abby trailed off. She often just let sentences about her family fade off without a defined end.

“Just remember our apartment is a 3rd floor walkup,” Harper reminded her, “that’s a lot of steps at 2AM in the cold.”

“Yeah, I know. That’s part of why I haven’t brought it up until now, I know how much work it would be. There are always so many cute pups at Animal Friends to adopt, though. We could give one a good home,” Abby suggested, hoping Harper would be on board with the idea, “But what about you? What do you want to do in the new year?”

“I want to quit my job,” Harper blurted out, definitively.

“What?” Abby responded, clearly confused. This was the first she had heard of this.

Harper put her fork down and looked at Abby, “Yeah, I want to find a new job. Ever since the ownership of the Post-Gazette changed, things have been constantly getting worse. I don’t agree with the direction they are taking the paper. I’ve thought about it a lot and I don’t want to be a part of it, even if it hurts my career to make a change.”

“Wow, I knew you didn’t agree with a lot of what they have been doing, but I didn’t know you wanted to leave. That’s a big step.”

“I’ve been thinking about it a lot and it’s something I want to do. I won’t quit right away or anything, I know we need the money. I want to start looking for other options, though.”

“I’ll support you in whatever you want to do. Even if I have to pick up some additional pets to sit, or get a part time job or something, we’ll figure it out.”

“Thank you, honey. I didn’t really intend to bring this up tonight, we can talk more about it later, but I also want to be completely honest in the new year. Seemed like a good time to start.”

Harper’s phone began to buzz at the end of the counter. She picked it up from under the mess of food packaging to see Tipper’s name. This time, she was not going to announce her mother's call to the room. Harper hadn’t spoken to either of her parents since she and Abby had left their house earlier that week. She didn’t know what their next conversations would be like and she wasn’t yet ready to find out. That was a problem for next year.

Not even a minute later, she had a text from her mom.

_Just calling to say Happy New Year’s to you and Abby. Be safe tonight._

**Thanks Mom. We’re staying in so no need to worry. Happy New Year.**

It was strange to see Abby’s name in her mom’s text message. Harper had spent so long trying to avoid her parents finding out about her relationship with Abby that hearing them say her name, or in this case text her name, was still jarring. 

She put her phone down and took a moment to make sure she was mentally present in the moment with Abby. She had let her parents infiltrate too much of their holiday time together already and wasn’t about to make that same mistake again.

Harper began to help Abby clean up the kitchen. Considering the mess they had made, cleanup wasn’t actually that bad. Soon enough, the dishes were in the dishwasher, the leftovers had been put away, and the table had been wiped clean. When they were done, Harper spied the clock on the wall out of the corner of her eye.

“It’s only 10 o’clock. What do you want to do for two hours?” she asked as she approached Abby.

Abby looked directly into Harper’s eyes, knowing what was coming next.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (If you want to avoid the sex, skip this chapter.)
> 
> Thursday, December 31, 2020 (cont'd)

Harper wrapped her arms around Abby, pulled her in to a close embrace, leaned down, and kissed her softly. She first planted a few tender kisses on her girlfriend’s lips, then moved on to kissing her cheek, and down her neck. There was no other feeling in the world like kissing Abby.

At the same time, Abby ran her hands slowly down Harper’s body, appreciating the fact that her yoga pants were form fitting.

Harper turned her attention back to Abby’s lips. She held Abby’s head in her hands, much the same way she had done in that gas station parking lot a few nights earlier, and kissed her deeply. 

“I love you,” Abby whispered in between kisses.

“I am so happy to hear you say that. I love you, too. So much. Come with me,” Harper said as she grabbed Abby’s hand and led her upstairs. 

Once upstairs, Harper and Abby stood motionless for a moment at the side of their bed in anticipation. 

Abby looked up into Harper's eyes, took a deep breath, and led her over to the bed. Just as Harper began to sit down on the bed, Abby grabbed the bottom of Harper’s shirt. Abby pulled the soft tee shirt over Harper's head as Harper sat down on the bed. Abby pushed Harper down onto her back and climbed on top of her, straddling her. She tucked her hair behind her ears and kissed her, slipping her tongue delicately into Harper’s mouth. Abby's heart was racing as the moment intensified. 

They had done this many times before, but this felt different. It was as if everything else in the world had faded away and they were the only two that existed. Aside from the New Year’s party playlist continuing to play in the background downstairs and the city noise on the street below, it was as if the world had stopped turning.

Harper pulled Abby’s sweatshirt over her head and discovered she hadn’t been wearing a bra under her top. She brought her hands to Abby’s breasts, hoping she would get to kiss them soon, too. Her hands continued to explore her girlfriend’s body, even though she already knew it so well. Over the course of their relationship, she had studied every curve. She knew every freckle and every scar, but it still wasn’t enough. She had never wanted anything as much as she wanted Abby. Harper had never felt for anyone even a fraction of the love she felt for Abby. Harper's love for her was unending and deeper than she had words to explain, even if she hadn’t always been able to show it recently. Harper wanted Abby forever. She wanted more than anything to be her wife.

Harper rolled Abby onto her back and took control. She fulfilled her desire to kiss Abby’s chest and her mouth made its way further down her body before returning to kiss her again. She ran a hand down Abby’s body and slipped it inside her sweatpants.

Pulse racing, Abby let out a deep breath as Harper touched her. Harper brought her hand back to Abby’s chest as she continued to kiss her. She didn’t want to rush things tonight.

“Babe…” Abby pleaded, knowing Harper often kept her waiting longer than she wanted her to. 

The dim lighting in the room offered just enough illumination for the women to see one another. Harper stared intently into Abby’s eyes as she moved her body back and forth atop Abby’s. Abby’s skin felt soft and warm despite the winter cold outside.

Abby wiggled her sweatpants and underwear off and tugged at Harper’s yoga pants requesting she do the same. Harper complied by kneeling for a moment and removing her pants. She lost her balance for a moment and they both laughed as she fell to one side of the bed. It was moments of true comfort like this that made their sex even more deeply connecting.

Harper threw her yoga pants and underwear to the floor and removed her bra, too. While she was up, she reached over to the nightstand nearby and squeezed some lube onto her fingers. Now both completely naked, she pulled their comforter over them as she returned to her position atop Abby, trying not to get the lube on the comforter.

She planted a quick kiss on Abby’s lips before asking, “Can I?”

“Please,” Abby whispered back, desperately. She had already been waiting for too long. She was ready to be taken wherever Harper would lead her. Being touched by Harper was a rush of emotion Abby could barely contain.

Harper kissed her girlfriend passionately as she began to touch her again. After a few moments, she carefully slipped herself inside of Abby. Abby took a deep breath as she adjusted to Harper’s presence within her. Harper moved her fingers in and out, using her palm to tease her clit, too.

“Fuck,” Abby panted, still reeling from Harper’s kisses even after a few deep breaths. She was completely lost in the moment. Abby arched her back upwards and tried to bring her body even closer to Harper’s, somehow.

Harper loved the feeling of being surrounded by Abby. She felt closer to her now, both physically and emotionally, than she had since the night they walked together in the holiday lights, and she didn't want it to end. She knew that Abby didn’t want to delay any further, though.

Harper intensified her motions and Abby moaned quietly in time with her movement. A moment later, Abby's body shuddered as she came with Harper still inside of her.

“Babe,” Abby was unable to find any other words to describe her state. She placed a hand on Harper’s cheek and stared into her girlfriend’s beautiful eyes. Harper removed herself from Abby and collapsed onto the bed next to her. Abby pulled her in close, wrapping her arms tightly around Harper’s naked body.

“I love you,” they said in unison. They couldn’t have timed it better if they tried.

After a moment of recovery but without saying a word, Abby loosened her embrace of Harper and disappeared under the covers. She wanted to make Harper feel the same exhilaration she had. Abby licked her way down Harper’s body, stopping only to encircle each of Harper’s nipples. She didn’t waste any time. She immediately maneuvered her head between her girlfriend’s legs and Harper spread her legs to make room for her.

Abby’s mouth was drawn to Harper’s clit. She tried to wait, to take her time, but she couldn’t hold off even a second. She didn’t want to. She wanted Harper now. Abby licked her, making circles with her tongue. Her warm breath made Harper shudder as she alternated between sucking and licking. 

Harper moaned loudly as she grabbed the back of Abby’s head with her right hand. She pressed Abby further into her.

Abby continued to lick her, not wanting to stop even for air. It didn’t take long for Harper to come with a long exhale. After waiting for a moment to make sure there wasn’t an opportunity for more, Abby surfaced and laid down next to Harper, happy to have satisfied her partner.

They laid together in silence, bodies still intertwined. That night, on a holiday focused on the passage of time, time stood still in their apartment. There was no the pain from their recent past. There were no worries about their future. There was merely the present moment: the two of them, still deeply in love, together.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Friday, January 1, 2021

By the next morning, Harper and Abby were spread out on opposite sides of the bed. It was always an unexpected joy when they woke up cuddled together, but it didn’t happen often. Between Harper’s long limbs and Abby’s blanket stealing, most nights they needed their space to get any amount of restful sleep.

Harper was the first to stir. She woke up positioned on her left side, facing the window. Her first vantage of the new year was of the cloudy, gray sky. She watched sleepily as an unending stream of clouds slowly progressed across the sky. Harper was warm and cozy under the covers, still happy to be back from her parents and in her own bed. Her room at the Caldwell’s hadn’t been her home in many years and she was reminded of that every time she slept there.

She continued to watch the sky outside of the window as her mind started to drift to thoughts of the year ahead. Harper was glad to see the dawn of a new year. As someone who had always thrived on setting and achieving goals, the turn of the calendar had always presented her with an opportunity to prepare for her next successes. This year would be different, though. This time, her only goal for the new year was to be true to herself. Harper knew she had to forge a new relationship with her family. The Caldwell’s needed to finally get to know the ‘real’ Harper and she needed to be ready for the growing pains that would come with that. More importantly, she needed to continue to work to repair her relationship with Abby. She was committed to being completely honest: with her family, with Abby, and with herself.

Half an hour or so passed as Harper daydreamed about the year ahead before biology necessitated that she get out of bed, even at the risk of disturbing Abby. She carefully crawled over her girlfriend, trying not to move her. Thankfully, her long legs allowed her to extract herself from the situation and make her way to the bathroom.

A bit later, as she drank her morning cup of coffee, Harper stared at her phone sitting on the table in front of her. Now that she was awake and ready for the day, it was time to make one of the calls she had been avoiding. She took a deep breath, picked up the phone, and initiated a call to her parents. 

“Harper, I am so glad you called,” Tipper said as she picked up the phone. 

Harper felt an uneasy nervousness take up residence in her body as soon as she heard her mother's voice. “Hi Mom,” Harper answered, apprehensive about the upcoming conversation.

“Happy New Year! How was your New Year’s Eve?” Tipper asked before continuing without giving her an opportunity to answer, “We went to the country club and your father had one too many glasses of wine.”

“Oh no, is he OK?”

“Yes, he’s fine. We were home before 10 o’clock, no harm done. Your New Year’s Eve?” Tipper redirected the conversation back to Harper forcefully.

“It was nice. It was low key. We just stayed in and watched movies,” Harper said, knowing she didn’t want to give away much of what they had done the previous night. 

“Well, that does sound nice,” Tipper replied, not pushing the question any further. “Oh, I’ve been meaning to ask you. When you unpacked your bags, did you happen to find my Christmas brooch?”

“Mom! Abby told me about your conversation before the party and no, she did not take it! She is not a criminal and I-”

‘I know that,” Tipper interrupted, “I just can’t find it anywhere. I’ve been asking everyone, even Sloane and the kids... especially Sloane and the kids.”

“Abby unpacked the other day and didn’t mention it. I’m sure if she found it, she would have told me. It will turn up,” Harper tried to reassure her mother, irritated to even be discussing it.

“Speaking of, how is Abby doing?” Tipper asked with more sincerity than Harper had expected.

“She’s doing well. She doesn’t go back to school for another week, so she’s been enjoying some down time reading and relaxing while I’ve been at work.” Harper said, unsure of how much information to provide. This part of the conversation was uncharted territory.

Coincidentally, Abby stepped softly down the stairs just as Harper had been talking about her. Abby made her way into the kitchen in yet another white tank top and the same sweatpants she had been wearing the night before. She picked up a fresh mug of coffee, leaned against the countertop, and waited a moment for the coffee to cool before taking a sip.

Harper watched Abby closely. _Damn, she’s so sexy,_ she thought to herself before refocusing on her conversation with her mother.

“That’s good. That’s good,” Tipper said, repeating herself. She wasn’t sure exactly how to proceed with the discussion either. “Well, I better be going. We have to meet Carolyn for brunch in a bit and I have to get your father moving. I’d like to get a New Year’s selfie for his Instagram account, but he was certainly not looking photo worthy last night.”

“Tell him I said Happy New Year’s, please. Enjoy brunch,” Harper replied.

“I will, bye now,” Tipper said as she ended the call.

Harper put the phone back down on the counter. And just like that, the conversation she had been avoiding for almost a week was over. It had lasted only a couple minutes and honestly, it felt pretty normal. A wave of calm rushed through her as she released the tension from her shoulders and she consciously unclenched her jaw. 

“Good morning, love,” Harper said to Abby, breaking their brief silence.

“Hey,” Abby greeted Harper with careful kindness, unsure how her conversation with her parents had gone.

“That was my mom, she asked about you.”

“I heard; how did it go?”

“Well, I think. It’s still so strange that they know,” Harper didn't have words to describe the relief of having a discussion, even a brief one, about her girlfriend with one of her parents. After fifteen years of fear and dread, it was really happening. She could hardly believe it. 

“Yeah, but I’m glad they do.”

“Me too.”


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Friday, January 1, 2021 (cont'd)

“What do you want to do today?” Harper asked as cereal dropped out of the box into the bowl in front of her with a series of pings. She was still awash with relief after the discussion with her mother, even though it had only been a brief conversation. 

The apartment was warmly illuminated by mid-morning light shining in from the windows on either side of the open concept living space. Abby had settled into the living room and was looking at her phone with the Tournament of Roses Parade on TV in the background.

“Do you think White Whale Books will be open today? I finally finished the book I have been reading and I’d like to look for something new,” Abby answered, her lack of grasp on the time and date revealing itself once again.

“I’m not sure. Do you want to take a walk up that way and see?”

“Sure, that could be nice.”

Once Harper finished her breakfast, the women bundled up and set out on their New Year’s Day walk. The cold was tolerable as there wasn’t much wind and, surprisingly, the sun was attempting to peek through the clouds occasionally. Harper reached for Abby’s gloved hand as they walked down the street.

“Which way do you want to go?” Harper asked. They often walked through the nearby cemetery, but Harper never liked to suggest it, just in case.

“Let’s take the long way through Allegheny Cemetery,” Abby replied, thinking it was her idea. Abby didn’t mind the cemetery. Her parents weren’t buried here, but even if they had been, she would have had to make her peace with it months ago as you could see the cemetery in the distance from the front windows of their apartment. If anything, she found it a peaceful place to walk in the midst of such a bustling city neighborhood.

Abby and Harper held hands as they walked silently through the winding roads in the cemetery, taking an indirect, meandering path slowly up the hill towards Penn Avenue. When they walked together, Harper had to actively try not to outpace Abby as each of her steps covered significantly more ground than her girlfriend’s did. It was especially evident when they were walking up a hill like this one and Abby became winded trying to keep up. There were a few other walkers in the cemetery, and they smiled and said ‘Happy New Year’ as they passed by each one.

“I’m still so relieved after talking to my mom this morning,” Harper shared with Abby, working to make good on her promise of honesty.

“I’m glad it went well, Harp. Did she have anything exciting to report?” Abby asked, hoping for a hint as to whether Tipper, Ted, or Jane had located her misplaced ring.

“Not really. Apparently, my dad drank too much wine last night, which is unusual for him. He’s usually in complete control. She didn’t say much more than that.”

“It’s still good you got that first conversation out of the way; I know you were nervous about it.”

“Yeah, I’m glad the first one is done.” Harper was grateful to have Abby’s support as she navigated her new family dynamic. “I’m thinking I’ll call my sisters soon, too. John reaching out to Jane about her book will give me something to talk about with her, and as pissed as I am at Sloane, she might need some family support now, too. I wasn’t the only one to drop a bombshell on Christmas Eve.”

“They’d probably appreciate that,” Abby responded, unsure what to suggest as she didn’t have siblings herself.

“Or Sloane will be her normal self and make it into a competition somehow. I don’t know. But I’m thinking that maybe if I reach out to her, we could turn over a new leaf, so to speak. You know? It might be nice to have my sisters on the same team as me for once.”

“Yeah, I had no idea how ultra-competitive you and Sloane are. I don’t know how you do it.”

“It has been that way as long as I can remember… since we were kids trying to win trophies in dance class, I think. I honestly don’t know any other way, but I’m willing to try to figure it out,” Harper said with sincerity in her voice she didn’t usually have when discussing her family. “But thank you for being so supportive of me, baby. I really appreciate it.”

Abby looked up at Harper and nodded. _I wish we had been able to have conversations like this before_ , Abby thought to herself. Nonetheless, she was happy to be beginning to have them now.

Harper and Abby eventually reached the top of the cemetery and exited onto the city sidewalk. They crossed the street and headed toward the bookstore. From a block or so away, they could see that it was dark inside. Unsurprisingly, the store was closed for the holiday.

“Damn,” Abby said, “Maybe I’ll come back up tomorrow.” Abby peered into the darkened shop and envisioned herself flipping through the pages of the texts inside. She and Harper had both been known to get lost in a bookstore for hours at a time. Many a date night had been spent by walking up to the store and browsing for hours, stopping for ice cream or a drink on the way home.

“Well, at least we’re saving the hundred dollars or so we might have spent if they had let us in,” Harper kidded, “Want to just keep walking?”

“Sure.”

“OK, but before we go, come here,” Harper said as she pulled Abby closer to her. She leaned down, adjusted Abby’s scarf to free her lips, and kissed her. She kissed her deeply, feeling the excitement of the fresh start the new year had offered, as they stood in the middle of the sidewalk without a care in the world of who might see them. “I fucking love you,” Harper said seriously as she loosened her grip on Abby and returned her gloved palm to her partners.

With the whole day ahead of them and nothing lined up to do, they walked around Bloomfield and wandered their way towards Shadyside before eventually turning back towards home, thankful for a winter day warm enough to get outside. 


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Monday, January 4, 2021

John usually had a way with words, but for some reason he couldn’t seem to settle on the right words to initiate his first text message to Jane. 

“Hi Jane. It’s John, from Christmas,” John typed into his phone, before thinking better of it.

_John from Christmas? Who am I, the second coming of St. Nicholas?_ he thought to himself as he deleted everything he had typed and started over. He was back in his office after the extended Christmas holiday feeling equally recharged after some downtime and utterly irritated by the necessity of even having a job to begin with.

**Hi Jane. This is John, Abby’s friend. How are you?**

Satisfied with his second draft, John pressed send and stared at his device for a moment hoping for a swift reply from Jane. Unfortunately, he didn’t receive an immediate response. He passed some time scrolling through his Twitter feed as he waited. After ten minutes or so, now feeling thoroughly distressed by the state of the world after a quick dive down his timeline, he put his phone down, shook his head, and returned to work.

A few hours later, just when he was starting to wonder if Jane was even going to respond to his message, he finally received a reply.

_Hi John! I’m great. Just back from my parents’. Their cable wasn’t working, but Jane to the rescue!!_

**They’re lucky to have you. Speaking of – how are they?**

As soon as John sent the message, he brought his palm to his forehead in distress. _What even was this conversation? W_ _hy would someone she’s only met once text her out of the blue to ask about her parents? That doesn’t make any sense,_ he thought to himself.

Fortunately, if the conversation was unusual, Jane didn’t notice. She answered his message right away.

_They’re so good. I’ve been over there a lot lately; they just can’t seem to keep their Wi-Fi connected without me._

**Glad to hear they’re well. Anyway, I’m reaching out to you out nowhere because I’ve been thinking about Second Sister since we discussed it over the holiday. Would you be interested in meeting with me and my company about it?**

John had expected a quick reply. First time authors often had to try very hard to conceal their genuine, unbridled joy at the prospect of discussing their work with an agent. He didn’t like to make a big deal of it, but it was actually one of the best parts of his job. Not many people get the satisfaction of helping make other people’s dreams come true.

Jane, however, already wasn’t his average author. Once again, he waited for a prompt reply, but none arrived. Forty-five minutes later, as the first workday of the year was finally beginning to wind down, his phone buzzed with Jane’s response.

_Would I?!? You know it!_

**Great. How’s Thursday at 1PM? We’ll call you.**

_I’ll clear my afternoon!_

John didn’t respond for a moment as he tried to think of how best to transition the conversation from work to Abby’s misplaced valuable. However, Jane followed up with a question before he had decided what to do.

_John, have you seen Harper or Abby lately?_

**Abby and I had lunch last week, why do you ask?**

John wanted to just come out and ask Jane if she had the ring, but Abby had been so nervous about the potential of the Caldwell’s finding it that he knew it was best to proceed with caution. Plus, it dawned on him in that moment that even if Jane had found the ring, she wouldn’t know for sure who it belonged to.

_I think I have something of theirs..._

_I found something in my room when I was downstairs looking for a cable connector today…_

_I found a ring..._

_I found an engagement ring in my room!_

**Yes, it is Abby’s – for now. Can you keep it safe?**

_I can try…_

**OK, more importantly, can you keep it a secret?**

_That will be harder… I want to tell everyone! But I will try to keep it our little secret..._

And there it was. Jane had found the ring, would keep it safe, and would keep it a secret. Now Abby just had to get it from her. That shouldn’t be too hard, right?

After wrapping up the day answering a few emails, John powered down his computer, straightened up his desk, and packed up to leave for the day. He put on his heavy gray coat and wrapped a warm scarf around his neck. He walked down the stairs of the old house-converted-to-office building where he worked, carefully glancing back and forth between the screen of his phone and the stairs in front of him. Once he was outside of the building, and free of the confines of having an occupation, he initiated a call to Abby.

“Great news!” he said before she even had a chance to say hello.

“You finally decided ultra-suede was the right choice?” Abby said, with absolutely no emotion in her voice.

“No, I still don’t know about that. Am I on speaker? Are you alone?” John asked as he continued to walk towards his car, being careful not to step in the puddles of melted snow that filled the cracks in the sidewalk.

“Yes. No. Yes.” 

“Yes, I’m on speaker, or yes, you’re alone?” John had no idea what Abby’s responses to his simultaneous questions had meant.

“Yeah, that didn’t make sense. Harper’s at work, I’m alone.”

“Ok, good. Jane has the ring, she hasn’t told anyone, and she will keep it safe.”

“I am so relieved to hear that, I could kiss you. And her,” Abby said, relief evident in her voice.

“You’re welcome, but let’s not do that. You’re really not my type. And she’s your sister-in-law.”


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Saturday, January 23, 2021

“What are you planning to do today?” Harper asked Abby as she took the last bite of what had been a fluffy stack of homemade pancakes. “If you don’t mind, I’d like some time to myself in the house this afternoon.”

“I can go to school for a while, how much time do you need?”

“Just a couple hours. I want to call my sisters. It’s not that I don’t want you here, I just… I don’t know. I need to do this on my own,” Harper explained, worried Abby would take her request for space personally.

“It’s no problem. I want to take a quick shower first, then I can go to campus for a few hours,” Abby responded as she spun the last bite of pancake around her plate to absorb any remaining syrup before eating it. 

“Thanks, babe. I appreciate it. Here, let me clean up,” Harper said as she stacked the plates and utensils that had been spread across the table. She took the dishes into the kitchen and began to load the dishwasher, carefully placing each plate inside. “Sometimes I feel like all we do in life is load and unload this damn thing,” she muttered.

“That, and laundry,” Abby added with a tinge of sarcasm as she started upstairs to take a shower. “Do you want to go out tonight and let someone else do the dishes for once?”

“That could be nice,” Harper called as she watched Abby bound upstairs.

With the dishes cleaned up and the dishwasher now humming gently in the background, Harper stood with her hands on her hips and looked across the apartment as she tried to decide what to do next. Their apartment was almost always clean, but a few minutes spent freshening up the space might help to start her day with a productive tone.

“Hey Google, play 80’s music,” she called towards the living room.

_Sure, playing All Out 80’s playlist on Spotify._

Harper strutted her way into the living room as ‘I Wanna Dance with Somebody’ played in the background. She started to tidy up, beginning by fluffing the pillows on the couch and refolding the blanket that hung over the armrest. She continued to clean up, sorting through some of the magazines on the coffee table, interspersing cleaning with some subtle dance moves here and there when the mood struck. 

A bit later she was alternating between dusting off the photos on the windowsills and dancing to Belinda Carlisle when she felt Abby peering in her direction.

“Hey!” Harper said, embarrassed she had been caught. “Come on, nobody can listen to this stuff and not dance a little. I mean, 1987 was a year!”

Abby approached Harper and wiggled her shoulders subtly in time with the music. Harper continued to dance, exaggerating her moves now, knowing how much her partner disliked dancing. Harper put her hands on Abby’s shoulders and moved them back and forth with the beat as the song came to an end. There was a brief second of silence before a new song began, which Harper used to plant a quick kiss on Abby’s cheek.

“I’m gonna go so you can get back to your 80’s party,” Abby said as she backed away with a smirk, pointing at the door. She pulled a warm, gray beanie over her still damp hair, put on her coat, and closed the buttons on her jacket with gloved fingers in anticipation of the winter cold outside. Once she was adequately insulated, she moved towards the door. “I think I’ll be gone about three hours, but if you need more time, text me.”

“Ok, I will. Love you,” Harper replied as she and Abby kissed goodbye.

Harper watched as Abby left the apartment and locked the door behind her. She stood still for a moment, enjoying the satisfaction of a clean living space. She had one more thing to do before getting down to business, though. She stopped the music and started up the stairs to take a shower of her own. 

Half an hour or so later, now showered and ready for the day, Harper sat down at the kitchen table and picked up her phone to dial her sister. She stared at the screen for a few seconds, building up the courage to initiate the call. Once she finally pressed the button, the phone rang a few times before a voice could be heard on the other end. Unfortunately, it wasn’t exactly what she was hoping to hear.

“This is Sloane, leave a message.”

Harper hadn’t been prepared to leave a message and before she had time to decide what to say, she heard the dreaded ‘beep’ indicating it was time for her to speak. _I could just hang up_ , she thought to herself, but it was already too late, the message had already started to record.

“Um, Hi. It’s me. Call me back when you have a chance. I want to talk to you. Nothing’s wrong. Just, you know, calling to check in, I guess. I don’t know. Anyway, call me back.”

_Off to a great start. You would think for someone who works in communications, I could leave my own sister a voicemail that makes sense,_ she thought to herself.

Harper banished the self-criticism from her mind and quickly moved on to finding Jane in her phone’s contact list. It was strange, when she really took the time to think about it, that she didn’t know her sister’s phone numbers from memory. When she was growing up, before everyone had a cell phone in their pocket, you had to either remember or write down phone numbers to be able to call them. She used to have at least a dozen of her friend’s numbers memorized, if not more. Over the years she had forgotten all of them but one, though. The Bennett’s home phone number was burned into her memory, even though at this point she didn’t even know if the number still belonged to them.

“Helloooooooo,” Jane answered the phone with her ever-present upbeat energy.

“Hi, Jane. How are you?”

“I’m great. Did mom or dad tell you my news?”

“No, they didn’t. What’s up?” Harper replied tentatively. She had a feeling this might be related to John and her book, but didn’t want to overstep, just in case.

“Well, remember Abby’s friend John? Oh, wait – is he your friend, too? Remember your friend John?”

“Yes, of course.”

“We talked about my book on Christmas, and I could tell he really understood it. He just got it in a way none of you ever did.”

Jane paused briefly and Harper was unsure if she should try to fill the space or just let Jane continue. She opted to stay silent and let her sister have her moment.

“His company is going to explore the idea of publishing the book!” Jane’s practically shouted, her excitement evident even over the phone. Harper could imagine the bright smile spread across her face.

“I’m not sure that the world is really done, though. I still have so many more ideas and so many of my characters need more attention. But, I’m so glad you called because I’ve been wanting to tell everyone about it. I know so many things I want to tell everyone about!” Jane continued.

“Jane, that’s great. I’m so excited for you. What happens next? Do you know yet?”

“John told me to send in a proposal and a couple of sample chapters. They are going to read it and let me know what they think. It was so hard to decide what sample of the book to send. You can’t understand the whole world in just a few chapters. And, more importantly, you know, if they don’t properly understand the importance of basic Thorfian rights, the whole thing won’t make any sense,” Jane said, rushing through the words. She was speaking quickly now, passion for her story evident in each word.

“I could have helped you with the proposal, why didn’t you call me?”

“Oh, I didn’t want to bother you. I know none of you like my book,” Jane said so nonchalantly it struck Harper with sadness. She wanted to be a better sister to Jane.

“Well, that’s actually kind of why I called. I’m sorry for everything.”

“You already apologized about the painting.”

“No, no. Not just about the painting. I’m sorry I’ve been so dismissive of you. I’m sorry I haven’t taken your book seriously… taken you seriously. I want to do better. I want to be a better sister to you, you deserve it,” Harper professed, voice shaking a little bit as she spoke.

“Thank you, Harper. I want to be a better sister, too. I can help you, like I help mom and dad!”

“You don’t need to change anything, Jane. You don’t need to change anything at all. But will you tell me more about your book?” Harper asked with sincerity, intending, for the first time, to actually listen to her. Harper settled into the corner of the couch and covered herself with the blanket she had just folded earlier that day, ready to learn about Jane’s universe.

Jane was more than happy to oblige and filled the next hour or so with the same overview of the book she had given John on Christmas day. Harper noticed right away how comfortable and confident Jane was when she spoke about her work. She was clearly proud of what she had been creating on for so many years. _How have I never noticed this side of her before?_ Harper thought to herself.

“…and that’s all I can tell you now,” Jane said, concluding her explanation.

“Why’s that?” Harper asked. “I know there has to be more.”

“Well, you have to read the rest. And, I’m supposed to be at mom and dad’s in a bit, so I have to go get ready.”

“Thanks for sharing all of that with me, Jane. You’re right, I never did really understand before. Tell them I said hello”

“Any time. I will. I’ll talk to you later.”

Harper ended the call and took a deep breath of relief. She genuinely couldn’t wrap her mind around why she had been so critical of Jane for so many years. Sure, Jane hadn’t competed in the way she and Sloane always had, but maybe Jane had been the smartest of the three of them all along for not doing so.

Harper stood up from her prone position on the couch and stretched. She lifted her arms high above her head and held the position for a moment. She then folded her body into a downward facing dog position before lowering herself to the floor into child’s pose. Despite her efforts to block out external interference and focus, she could hear her phone buzzing on the coffee table next to her. She rose from the floor quickly to answer the phone before she missed the call.

“Hey, Sloane,” Harper answered the phone with a firmness in her voice.

“I knew you would break and call me first,” Sloane said, sharply.

“Seriously, Sloane? I thought we were done competing like this?” Harper asked, clearly irritated. She and Jane had been able to start fresh relatively quickly, but perhaps with Sloane, old habits would be harder to break.

“You’re right.”

Harper was shocked to hear even a tinge of concession from Sloane. In the past, the only kind words and apologies they had shared were those forced by their parents after they argued as children.

“How have you been?” Harper asked, ready to listen to Sloane as intently as she had listened to Jane earlier.

“I’m OK. I just got back from taking the twins to soccer practice and dropping them off with Eric for the rest of the weekend. Honestly, I’m probably going to crack open a bottle of wine soon. It’s mid-afternoon, which, considering the kids insist on waking up long before sunrise, is plenty late enough for wine.”

“I didn’t know you and Eric were already living separately.”

“He moved out a few weeks ago. We’ve tried to keep things as normal for the kids as we can, though. Or at least as normal as living in two separate places can be,” Sloane said, tentatively, as she shared the details of her life with Harper.

“They seemed pretty normal over the holiday.”

“That was because we bribed them into keeping our secret. That has been one of the hardest parts, keeping everything a secret. But I guess you know about that,” Sloane said. She had been trying to emphasize with Harper, but her tone of voice still came across as mocking of her sister’s decade plus secret keeping.

“Yeah, I have some experience in that department. But it’s all out there now,” Harper responded, trying not to read into Sloane’s tone. She wasn’t surprised their conversation had immediately focused on such serious topics. Intensity had been their specialty for over three decades, after all.

“I shouldn’t have done it, Harper. I know I shouldn’t have outed you in front of everyone,” Sloane apologized quickly. “I didn’t have a plan for how I was going to tell mom and dad about my divorce. I had suspicions about you and Abby from the beginning, and when I actually saw you together, I thought it was my way out. I acted before I thought it through, and it… you know… it… escalated from there.”

“Thank you, Sloane. I really wish you hadn’t done it.”

“I know, me too. And thank you for not sharing my secret after I shouted yours at everyone we know. Don’t think I didn’t notice that. I did.”

Harper was grateful, and a bit surprised, to have received a genuine apology from Sloane. She had anticipated they would just continue forward without ever truly acknowledging what had happened on Christmas Eve. Vulnerability had never been a part of their relationship before, so this was new for both of them. 

“Have you talked to mom and dad more?” Harper inquired.

“Not really, just briefly now and then. I’m not sure they know what to say.”

“Same here. I talked to mom quickly on New Year’s but aside from a quick text here and there I haven’t heard from either of them.”

“Well, I’m sure dad’s trying to figure out how to salvage his campaign,” Sloane replied, knowing her dad was probably more stressed than he would admit. “And who knows, maybe mom is actually going to take up karate.”

“Can you imagine?” Harper said with a laugh. She could hear Sloane uncorking a bottle of wine in the background.

“No, I absolutely cannot. She would never. Oh…” Sloane paused for a second. “Eric’s calling. I have to get this. I’ll talk to you later,” Sloane said as she abruptly hung up the phone.

Harper was relieved to have finally spoken to both of her sisters and she was even more pleased that each conversation had gone well. She didn’t expect that her sisters would become her best friends, but at least they were beginning to improve their relationships.

She picked up her phone to text Abby, beginning to think of where to take her girlfriend for dinner.

**Hey baby, I’m done making my calls so come back whenever you’re ready. Thank you again for the space. Where can I take you for dinner to thank you?**

_OK, I’ll be home in an hour or so and we can decide when I get there._

**Sounds good. Love you. <3**


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Saturday, January 23, 2021 (cont'd)

Abby hadn’t necessarily been expecting to spend her Saturday afternoon alone in Oakland. She was happy that Harper felt comfortable enough to ask for the space she needed, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t rather have been spending her Saturday afternoon at home. Now that the spring semester was underway, Abby had already endured after a few late evenings on campus over the course of the prior week. In truth, she didn’t feel the need to go back over the weekend even though putting in a few Saturday afternoon hours might help prevent a few of those evening work sessions in the upcoming week. Abby wasn’t sure if she was in the mental space to actually get anything done, though. The last thing she wanted to do was spend her weekend afternoon attempting to work, but failing to actually get anything done.

Instead of heading to her workspace and trying to get ahead for the upcoming week, Abby decided to spend the afternoon strolling through the Carnegie Museum of Art. The museum was showing an exhibit of local artists’ pieces that Abby had been wanting to check out. Somehow, despite having several weeks off during the semester break, she had never found the time (or more realistically, the energy) to get there.

After parking her car on campus, Abby walked down Forbes Avenue toward the museum. Now that all of the undergraduates were back, the neighborhood was bustling with activity. A jogger, staring intently at their phone, approached her quickly on a collision course. Abby continued on her path toward the museum for a moment before stepping to the side just before the runner would have run directly into her.

“Sorry!” the jogger called as they continued at pace, somehow still staring intently at their device.

Abby considered responding in some way or waving in acknowledgement but realized it would be pointless. Instead, she turned off the sidewalk toward the front door of the museum, feeling hyper aware of her surroundings after her near collision.

She checked in at the front desk with her student ID and set off to roam the galleries. Abby had spent plenty of time in the CMoA over the years and was familiar with most of the long-term installations. She often liked to focus her visits on one particular exhibit or medium but given that her day at the museum was unexpected, she decided to wander freely and see where the afternoon would take her. She started with the local artist’s works, though, to make sure she saw them while she was there.

After strolling through the local artists exhibit, Abby wandered towards the Scaife Gallery. She always tried to keep the outside world firmly outside when she was walking through the museum, but today she didn’t seem to be able to prevent her thoughts from drifting to Harper. She found herself wondering how Harper’s afternoon was going, hoping everything was going well for her partner.

Abby had been surprised by how seriously Harper had been taking her commitment to be more open and honest over the last few weeks. Abby knew she probably shouldn’t have been surprised; Harper took just about everything seriously, but it was still a pleasant surprise to see it materializing so quickly. Now that she was back into the swing of a new semester, things were finally starting to feel good again. She and Harper had settled back into their typical routine, but with an added attention to the health of their relationship.

Abby was lost in thought in front of one a piece focused on the chaos of modern existence when she felt her phone vibrate. She spent a few more moments contemplating the painting in front of her before stepping back to check the message she had received. She stared at the home screen of her phone for several seconds before even checking the message. Upon seeing the time, she couldn’t believe several hours had passed already; it felt as though she had just arrived. Somehow, enough time had gone by that Harper was ready for her to return home.

Abby quickly responded to Harper’s text before returning her focus to the art. Now that she was here, she wasn’t quite ready to go home yet. Or at least she wasn’t yet ready to go in that moment.

However, after attempting to return her thoughts to the works in front of her, she once again found her mind constantly drifting back to the opportunity to hang out with Harper at home. Even though they had been living together for several months, she somehow still enjoyed spending all of her time with Harper. One of the most surprising aspects of their relationship had been how much she genuinely enjoyed spending every bit of her free time with her girlfriend. It sounded cliché to say but living with Harper honestly felt like a never-ending sleepover with her best friend.

Considering she hadn’t been expecting to spend the afternoon enjoying the museum at all and she had already studied the new exhibits she wanted to see, Abby decided to call it a day and head back home. She headed toward the exit and made the short but frigid journey back to her car.

Upon returning home, Abby found Harper reading in the living room.

“Hey babe,” Harper greeted her when she entered the apartment, tucked under a warm blanket.

“Well, how did it go?” Abby asked Harper, not wasting any time with formalities. Abby was struck by how relaxed and comfortable she looked. The conversations with her sisters must have gone well.

“How about I tell you over dinner? Did you decide where I can take you tonight?”

“How about Coughlin’s Law in Mt. Washington. Then maybe we could get a drink somewhere if we’re up for it,” Abby suggested, knowing they would most likely just come right home after dinner even if drinks sounded like a good idea at the moment.

“Yeah, that sounds great. I know it’s still early but I’m ready whenever you are.”

“Yeah, me too,” Abby replied, struck by how gorgeous Harper looked with the late afternoon sun illuminating her profile. 

Not even forty-five minutes later, Harper and Abby were seated at a table for two in the bright, open restaurant. They had first visited the restaurant in the summer when the large roll-up garage doors were open, allowing the summer breeze in as they enjoyed brunch with friends. This time the doors were closed, of course, but the drinks and food would still be just as good.

After ordering a drink each, Abby again asked Harper to reveal the details of her afternoon. “Well, we’re here. Now will you tell me how it went?”

Harper beamed with pride before even saying a word, “It went so well. Better than I could have imagined, baby. I am so relieved. I talked to Jane first. We were on the phone for over an hour. I can’t even think of any time I’ve talked to Jane for an hour before, ever. Honestly.”

“That’s awesome, what did you talk about?”

“Mostly about her book. I had no idea it was such a good story.”

“That’s because you never actually listened to her before,” Abby said, intending to be honest but perhaps coming across as confrontational instead.

Right at that potentially inopportune moment, their server arrived to drop of their drinks and take their order, forcing a pause in the conversation. Once they had departed, Harper jumped right back into the conversation without shying away from Abby’s comment.

“I know I didn’t listen to her before, and I apologized to her for that. You’re right. But I’m happy to have addressed it with her.”

“That’s a big step, Harp. Your family doesn’t seem to have too many honest conversations, so I’m sure that wasn’t easy,” Abby said, as she took a sip of her drink. 

“Speaking of honest conversations, you’re not going to believe this,” Harper said before she, too, took a sip of her beverage. “I called Sloane out for her bullshit.”

“No way, but what bullshit?”

“She was trying to be competitive with me right off the bat, but I didn’t bite. And honestly, after that, we had a nice conversation.”

“I’m proud of you, Harper. Seriously.”

“Oh, you don’t have to be proud of me. All I did was talk to the siblings I’ve had my whole life.”

“Yeah, but I know this was hard for you, so I’m proud. If you weren’t already buying me dinner, I’d buy you dinner.”

“At this point, does it really even matter who pays? I mean, it’s kind of all the same, isn’t it?” Harper asked Abby, hoping to coax an indication from her girlfriend that she was still invested in their relationship for the long haul.

“Yeah. It is. Speaking of money… have you thought any more about taking that trip we talked about?”

“I think we should do it,” Harper replied confidently, taking that as the reassurance she was hoping for.

Back in the fall, Harper and Abby had discussed going on a vacation together in the next year. They hadn’t gotten as far as actually planning anything but had daydreamed together about laying on the beach for Carnegie Mellon’s spring break.

“If I’m really going to leave the PG, which I do really want to do, I can use up my vacation time whenever we want,” Harper continued, “but your semester has been so busy so far. Do you think you’d actually be able to get away?”

“It might not be easy, but with nearly two months’ notice I think I can plan ahead enough to make it happen.”

Harper beamed with excitement at the idea of spending a week in paradise with her girlfriend. “Where do you want to go?

“We could go to a beach like we talked about back in the fall. Maybe Mexico? Or what about the Caribbean?”

“Do you think we could afford to go to an all-inclusive resort somewhere? We could be sipping drinks under a palm tree all day long.”

“I’m not sure, but we can look into it. It probably depends on where we decide to go. I want to make sure wherever we go is safe for us, though,” Abby said, thinking practically.

“Yeah, that’s a good point,” Harper replied, thankful Abby always thought of things like that. “What about Iceland? I’ve heard its supposed to be awesome there. Or we could go to California and see what LA life is all about.”

The women discussed their potential vacation options over the meal. They examined nearly every conceivable option from jet setting all the way to Hawaii to a ski trip to Jackson Hole, Wyoming; the latter of which Abby vetoed instantly. By the time they wrapped up their meal and decided to head back to the warm comfort of home, they had decided it would in fact be a beach trip, although the exact destination was still to be determined. 

“I can’t wait!” Harper squealed as they got into the car to head home, “I have had enough of this cold. I want to be in the sun with my toes in the sand tomorrow.”

“We can’t go tomorrow, we don’t even know where we’re going yet,” Abby reminded her partner. “Plus, this gives us something to look forward to. We do have a lot to look forward to.”


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Saturday, February 6, 2021

“Today’s the sixth, babe. We’re only a month away from our trip! I can’t believe it,” Harper said to Abby as she stuffed a container of Greek yogurt, two protein bars, and a banana into her work bag, anticipating a long day.

“I know, I wish you didn’t have to go to work so we could start looking into what we want to do when we get there. I’ve been reading about which beaches are the best. It looks like a lot of them have bars right on the beach. I can’t wait.”

After their date night a few weeks ago, Abby and Harper had quickly booked a weeklong getaway to a tropical paradise. At first, they had difficulty deciding on their destination, but as it turned out, their travel options were limited by the fact that Harper’s passport had expired during the prior year. With their trip only six weeks away, they could book a trip out of the country and spend the next six weeks stressing about whether her new document would arrive in time or they could stay within the US. After some research, they learned US citizens can travel to the Virgin Islands without a passport, and their minds were set. The pair were headed to St. John for a week of sun on the beach, rum, and Caribbean cuisine come the first week of March.

“We can do some research tomorrow,” Harper replied as she kissed the top of Abby’s head and headed for the door. “I’m not sure exactly when I’ll be home tonight. The snow is supposed to start early afternoon so by the time I leave tonight it might be rough.”

“Yeah. Don’t forget I’m going out with John tonight, so I probably won’t see you until tomorrow anyway,” Abby reminded her partner without making eye contact.

“I remember babe, have a good time. Love you.”

The door closed behind Harper and without wasting a second, Abby sprang into action so quickly that she nearly tripped over the leg of her chair as she stood up. She threw on her black sneakers and gray knit hoodie and picked up a bunch of random snacks and threw them haphazardly into a plastic bag. After grabbing a bottle of iced tea from the fridge, she was ready to go. Before rushing out the door, though, Abby peeked out of the living room window at the space where Harper’s car had been parked on the street below to make sure Harper had successfully departed for work. With confirmation her partner was gone, Abby left the apartment, locking the door behind her and picking up her phone.

“Hey, yeah. I’m still coming, I’m hoping the snow won’t be as bad out your way. I’m leaving right now. See you soon.” 

Abby walked quickly to her car, which was parked a block or so away, with the mid-morning sun shining brightly in her eyes. She turned the car on and spent the next five minutes scraping the ice and frost from the car windows. She hadn’t put on her winter gear in anticipation of the warmth of the car interior but was regretting that choice now as the freshly scraped ice was piling on her fingers with each push of the scraper across the window.

 _Damnit, it’s cold,_ she thought to herself as she sat back down in the car and tried to squeeze her fingers between her legs to warm them back up. Once she had regained some of the feeling in her digits, she set up a queue of podcast episodes to play continuously. This was going to be one of the longest drives she had ever taken solo, so she’d need something engaging to keep her awake and ready.

Attempting to get to the Caldwell’s and back in one day would be a tall task under normal circumstances, let alone on a day with half a foot of snow incoming that afternoon. In the back of her mind, she knew this was probably a mistake, but she wanted Harper’s engagement ring back in her possession. She had already been without it for over a month, and considering it was the most expensive item she owned (aside from her car, which she still didn’t technically own thanks to a couple years of remaining payments), she wanted to get it back today, even if that meant taking a road trip in a blizzard. Abby and Jane had been waiting for weeks to try find a weekend day on which Abby could make the trip to come pick up the ring while Tipper and Ted would be gone for the day. If all went according to plan, she would be back home in Pittsburgh in the wee hours of Sunday morning, around the time the bars were to close, with tired eyes and the ring back in the safety of her pocket. 

With energy pulsing through her veins thanks to the caffeine kick of two extra cups of coffee, Abby set off. Conditions were perfect as she drove through the city and hit the highway, as long as she kept her sunglasses on to combat the reflection of the sun. The ground was covered with a blanket of white snow that had fallen a few days ago. Snowfall was hit or miss in Pittsburgh in the winter. Occasionally, two and three weeks would go by without so much as a flake falling in the sky, but in the very same winter season, several rounds of accumulating snow might fall in the span of a few days out of nowhere. The incoming snowfall on this particular day was just pure bad luck.

Driving worries about the incoming snow from her mind, Abby immediately began thinking of proposing to Harper. Lately, her mind wandered to her proposal plans whenever she had a few free moments. She still wasn’t ready to go through with it yet, but she was nearly certain she’d be ready at some point later in the year. Abby spent a lot of time thinking about how she was going to ask the question. She knew she wanted it to be a private moment for them, but wasn’t opposed to proposing somewhere in public, as long as it wouldn’t become a spectacle. She had considered proposing in Schenley Park, or maybe at Phipps Conservatory at the bottom of Flagstaff Hill. She had considered hosting a small gathering of their close friends to pop the question. Today, though, she was thinking of proposing with a scavenger hunt through all of the important places in their relationship. Her mind jumped from place to place as she thought of how she could guide Harper to the restaurant where they had spent their first date, the site of their first kiss, and a few other points that were important to their relationship. Was it too cheesy, though? Maybe. Maybe she would take the ring on their upcoming trip and see if the correct moment presented itself. _What am I thinking?_ she thought to herself. _I couldn’t even keep track of it on a short car trip._

Abby realized that, though she had been on the road for quite a while at this point, she hadn’t actually paid any attention to the podcast playing in the background. Keeping one hand on the wheel, and, somehow, both eyes on the road, she carefully stopped the podcast that had been playing and started a playlist of classic rock songs. In addition to being great road trip music, classic rock had been Abby’s dad’s favorite music. Thanks to him, she had known the words to quite a few Joan Jett songs long before she had any idea what they actually meant.

The snow had started to fall a few dozen miles ago. It wasn’t sticking to the ground yet, but its pace was increasing steadily with each passing minute. The large flakes were falling slowly from the sky, providing Abby with a snow globe-like view as the car sped along the highway. She wondered for a moment if she should turn back. Conditions were decent now, but if the snow continued at this pace and things got worse, she had no backup plan.

A few songs later, Abby was singing along louder than she would ever admit to anyone when the music stopped abruptly mid-song thanks to an incoming call. Luckily, her car had built in Bluetooth, so she didn’t have to fumble to answer the call on her phone.

“Hello?” she said skeptically, not having seen the caller ID before answering.

“Hey, it’s Jane. Just checking in! It’s a winter wonderland up here.”

“Yeah, that’s what I was just starting to worry about,” Abby replied, concern evident in her voice.

“Where are you?”

“I don’t know, it feels like I’ve been driving forever but I think I still have two or three hours left to go until I get to you. What’s it like there?”

“They’re saying six to eight inches over the next twelve hours. I really want to get out there and build a snowman once there’s enough!”

“Shit. I didn’t think you were supposed to get that much.”

Abby was well practiced at driving in the snow. Her parents had required that she trained for hours in inclement weather back when she had her learner’s permit. It seemed excessive at the time, but they knew that snow was inevitable in western Pennsylvania, and there is nothing worse than the drivers who can’t handle it. As a result, she wasn’t worried about herself or her snowstorm driving skills today. Instead, she was worried about the other idiots that would be out on the road with her. Not to mention the eighteen wheelers that would be sliding alongside her small car.

“Do you think I should turn back?”

“I’m sure you’ll be fine,” Jane said without any hesitation. Abby realized that maybe Jane was one of the drivers that didn’t know how to navigate snowy roads.

“I’ll let you know when I’m close.”

“OK, Bye now.”

 _Fuck. What should I do?_ Abby thought to herself after hanging up with Jane. If she continued on, she might get stuck. But, at this point, even if she turned around, she might get stuck on the way home, too. Her eyes glanced to her hastily packed snack bag: one snack size package of trail mix, a protein bar, and two bananas that she’d prefer not to eat as they were already past their prime. More importantly, she was down to half of the bottle of iced tea she had brought. Her supplies would keep her alive in an emergency, but they weren’t going to last long. Conveniently, there was a travel plaza coming up in a couple miles. She’d stop to re-evaluate her options.

Abby pulled the car safely into a parking spot and reached down to the center console cupholder to locate her phone. She immediately discovered she had eight notifications from her weather app about the storm. The forecast totals had gone up significantly and there were rumors on Twitter of the state police closing the interstate before conditions deteriorated.

 _Fuck._ This time she said it out loud.

As much as she didn’t want to, she knew she had to turn back and head home. Even if she made it to the Caldwell’s, there’s no way she’d be able to make the return trip in time to keep her adventure a secret from Harper. She turned off the car and jogged inside the rest stop to use the bathroom and fortify her food supplies, just in case. Even though it had only taken her a few hours to get this far, there was no telling how long it would take to get back home.

By the time she returned to her car, it was already covered in a thin layer of snow. She knew she was making the right choice heading home, even if she was disappointed. Abby re-set the same queue of podcast episodes she had set up a few hours ago, this time determined to stay focused on them and staying safe on the snowy road ahead of her. But before she clicked play, she had a call to make.

“Hey, it’s me again.”

“You’re here already?” Jane asked with sincerity in her voice.

“No, I turned around. I’m going back home. The snow’s getting pretty bad and I’m worried it wouldn’t be safe. I’m so pissed though.”

“It’s ok Abby, we’ll figure something out. Just be careful, please.”

“I will, I’ll let you know when I’m back home.” Abby said as she ended the call and pressed play. She kept her hands positioned firmly on the steering wheel and concentrated her attention on the road ahead as snow continued to fall.

By 10 PM, Abby had finally made it back to the city limits. Traffic on the interstate had moved steadily all afternoon and evening, but the snow had brought the speed of travel down to an excruciatingly slow top speed of 15 - 25 miles per hour. She began to relax as the Pittsburgh skyline unfolded in the darkness front of her, thinking she was almost home.

What she didn’t realize, though, was that traffic in the city was inching along at a snail’s pace thanks to a Penguins game that had just let out downtown. Her patience was nearly gone as the cars in front of her came to a complete standstill. _You have got to be kidding me,_ she thought to herself. This trip had been a nightmare and all she wanted to do was to get back home.

Nearly unbelievably, it took her another hour and a half to make the last four miles of her journey down Penn Avenue. As midnight approached, Abby finally turned into Lawrenceville to look for a parking spot. Parking in their neighborhood was always tricky, but Pittsburghers had a habit of trying to save their spots when it snowed, making it extra difficult. She passed street after street of parked cars with the occasional plastic chair saving a shoveled-out spot for someone else. Eventually, she found a space that was probably too small for her sedan, but she was able to successfully parallel park her car in it anyway.

As she turned off the car’s engine, she paused for a moment to appreciate the fact that she had mode it back safely. After this disaster of a day, she couldn’t help but wonder if the universe was against she and Harper getting married. She got out of the car and stretched her legs for the first time in hours, feeling tired, hungry, and completely miserable after a harrowing day that didn’t produce an engagement ring in her custody. 

As she trudged down the snowy sidewalk back to her apartment, she realized it wasn’t even snowing anymore.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sunday, February 14, 2021

“Waffles are coming up!” Abby called to Harper, who was sitting in the living room staring at her laptop, deep in thought.

“OK, I’ll be right there,” Harper replied, though, in truth she hadn’t actually listened to what her girlfriend had said. She was busy putting the finishing touches on a job application. “I just want to finish one thing… hold on… there… done!” She put down the computer and headed for the kitchen.

Over the last few weeks, Harper’s job search had shifted into high gear. She had spent most of January tweaking her resumé, writing an engaging cover letter, and trying to figure out exactly what she wanted to do with her life now that she was certain she wanted to leave the job she had worked so very hard to get.

Even after thinking about it seriously for a few weeks Harper still wasn’t sure what she wanted to do instead, though. Freelancing sounded appealing to her, but she knew it was a difficult way to make a living and on top of that, the lack of steady income while Abby was still in school definitely wasn’t ideal. She had thought of getting out of journalism entirely but decided against that as well. When it came down to it, she really liked the work she did. She just didn’t want to work for the PG any longer. The closest she came to any kind of decision was the idea that she would test the market for local journalism-adjacent positions, apply for anything that seemed appealing, and see where that would lead her. 

Once February began, Harper had started to submit applications for a wide variety of jobs including local columnist for the City Paper, assignment editor for WTAE-TV news, and corporate marketing and communications specialist for a large corporation. She was casting a wide net, hoping to position herself such that her background in journalism and lived experience adjacent to the public view, thanks to her father’s career in politics, could set her apart.

“Sorry, I’m here now. I’m ready,” Harper said as she sat down at the table. In front of her, Abby had prepared an elaborate brunch spread. Homemade waffles and a variety of toppings were spread across the table. Abby had even prepared a fresh cup of coffee for her, just the way she liked it.

“Welcome to Valentine’s Day Waffle Sunday. For the first couple years after I finished my undergrad degree, when we were all still figuring out how to be adults, my friends and I used to get together on Sunday mornings for waffles. We’d get together, eat, and just hang out during a time of the week that had previously always been occupied by studying or sleeping. Eventually life got busy and we stopped doing it, but I thought Valentine’s Day was a good reason to introduce you to it.”

“Looks delicious, babe. Thank you for doing all of this work. I’m sorry I didn’t help you get ready; I found a job posting I wanted to apply for right away this morning. I’m really excited about this one,” Harper said as she began to top her first waffle with fresh strawberries. “It’s a public and government relations coordinator job at a local LGBT focused non-profit organization. I’m sure the pay wouldn’t be great, but maybe I could help, you know?”

“That could be good. But are you sure you’re ready for that? I mean, you did have an LGBT public relations disaster of your own not even two months ago.”

“Yeah, it would be a challenge at first, but really think I’m ready. Everything that happened last year was so long overdue that I feel separated from it already, even if it wasn’t actually that long ago.”

“That makes sense,” Abby agreed as she shook some whipped cream off of a spoon onto her waffle.

Harper’s assembly was classic. She topped her waffle with strawberries, a few chocolate chips, and a drizzle of honey over the top. Abby’s, on the other hand, was a bit more decadent. It seemed Waffle Sunday was merely an excuse for Abby to blur the lines between breakfast and dessert. Hers was topped with ice cream, chocolate chips, hot fudge, whipped cream, and, of course, rainbow sprinkles.

She caught Harper eyeing her creation. “Hey, I got all of this stuff out, so I may as well use it,” she rationalized. “Plus, it’s Valentine’s Day and I’m spending it with the love of my life, so the calories don’t count.”

Harper’s skin flushed. She was still so happy to hear Abby reaffirm her love for her.

“I wasn’t judging, I was studying. This is my first Waffle Sunday and now that I see how it’s done, my next one will be a little bit more… inspired. I wasn’t sure if this was the type of event where overindulgence was encouraged.” 

“It’s Valentine’s Day and I set out a whole table full of options, it’s absolutely encouraged,” Abby said as she worked against time trying to eat her waffle before all of the ice cream melted. While it was a cold 20°F outside, their apartment was a comfortable temperature as long as you stayed away from the large windows. The indoor warmth, combined with a hot-off-the-press waffle, melted the ice cream just faster than Abby could eat it.

“Fair enough. I’ll put some of everything on my next one, then. All of it,” she said with a laugh. Harper was always up for a challenge.

“I love you so much, Harper,” Abby said sincerely as she fidgeted nervously in her chair a bit. “I really… I just…”

Harper wasn’t sure if Abby had more to say, but she cut her off and replied anyway, “I love you, too, Ab. So much.”

“I’m really happy to be spending Valentine’s Day with you, together in our home. It’s really special to me. You know what, hold on. I’ll be right back.” Abby got up from the table and bounded up the stairs, practically mid-bite.

Harper wondered for a moment what was coming next. Back in the fall, she and Abby had started to have hypothetical discussions about getting married. They discussed whether or not they each wanted to get married in general (yes), if they wanted to have kids someday (most likely yes), and where they might want to live long term once Abby graduated (TBD, though Harper knew it would be tough to get Abby to move out of Pittsburgh even though she didn’t have family ties to the area anymore). They hadn’t put a timeline on anything, but it had been nice to know they both saw their relationship heading in the same direction. Though they had never discussed it, Harper had assumed Abby would probably propose to her someday. She had been half expecting it to happen over the holidays, but that certainly didn’t go as planned.

On this Valentine’s Day morning, Harper found herself suspecting the moment she had been hoping for was about to arrive. She took a drink of water and sat up straight in her chair, preparing her body just in case. She didn’t need to prepare her mind; of course, she would say yes. Harper couldn’t help but envision Abby returning to the kitchen but instead of sitting down, kneeling at her side and grasping her hands. Harper would have to try to remember to be patient to let Abby get the words out before responding. She felt tears begin to well up just thinking about it.

Just then, she heard the toilet flush upstairs and the water begin to run in the bathroom.

 _I think you’ve gotten a little ahead of yourself,_ she thought as she tried to regain her composure and hide her emotions from her soon-to-return unsuspecting partner. Abby had gone to the bathroom, that was all.

“You OK?” Abby asked as she sat back down at the table.

“Yeah, I’m good. Just enjoying spending this time with you,” Harper replied, still amazed Abby could detect even subtle changes in her demeanor.

“I’m glad because I have a few ideas for today once we’re done eating. All of this talk of toppings has me thinking...”

“That could be fun.”


End file.
